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I know the feeling. I too am from a small community where it seems I run into past patients and family members in my off duty time. I recently had a "bad call" myself. It takes a while to get over it, sometimes longer then others. Being I occasionally run into the family members it brings the call back. One thing I try and do is not rehash it if possible even when asked. Talk to members in your squad, let folks on your crew know what you are going through. Sometimes by letting others know, you can find solice and healing because they themselves maybe feeling the same thing and just want to put on a strong persona. By talking about it it sometimes lets the emotions out and moves the healing process foward. Hell if worse comes to worse a good cry never hurts either. If all else fails please seek professional help, trying to live with a PTSD (which this can and will turn into if left untreated) can be hell. I have been there and if you search a few threads of mine about it you will see what I went through and how long I "put on the strong persona." Please don't suffer if you don't have to. The reason for the professional avenues of recovery is because we sometimes do need them. You are not weak, scared, a wimp ect for seeking help. You are human as we all are and sometimes the emotional stress we are put under is more then we can bare. We are the ones that everyone turns to in a crisis, yes even the 3am stubbed toe is a crisis to THAT person, we are the ones with the level heads the ones that bare the burdens of life and death at the worst times in someones life. Everyone thinks we are these immovable stone persons that look adversity in the face and laugh but unfortunatly no one sees what we deal with inside after the call. We are human so if the stress gets to much ( a few warning signs: reoccurent smells, nightmares, night terrors, insomnia, lack of motivation, lack of desire, sexual dysfunction) please seek the professonals out and get the help you need. Hope this helps you in some way. Know you do not suffer alone and at some point I think we have all been there.

One or two weeks of rather extreme stress reactions are normal in such a case. If it lasts more than this, try to get professional help. After the first one/two weeks it's completely normal to have some light flashbacks/reminiscences - in dreams, in similar settings, triggered by some special sensoric input (often: smell) or when driving near the place. This should not come very often, just once in a while and getting less. If it's happen regularly and/or you get extreme stress with influence on your daily life (and not "only" a bad dream once in a while) from those reminiscences then seek professional help. For our unit we have an informational sheet describing stress symptoms, normal and abnormal signs and some tips to cope (plus pointers to professional help). Every member gets to read this and it is permanently posted on the pin board. If you want I can try to translate it. Basically it helps knowing if you have such feelings you know, you're a normal human beeing...and there is help somewhere if those feelings really disturb your life. You're never the only one experiencing this...

You seem to have misunderstood Mr. Lincoln. Four hours spent practising carrying the axe around isn't the same as sharpening it. Congratulations on all your meaningless merit badges, but it seems that a couple of key points have escaped you. First, before you started taking advanced skills courses on the weekends, did it ever cross your mind that it might be a good idea to go to college and learn the foundations of human anatomy, physiology, psychology, and microbiology first? Oh that's right, us firemen don't need all that book learnin'. Just give me a needle, an ET tube, and a cookbook and I can save the world. The most significant reason that EMS is still living in 1972 is the fire service, and their self-centred refusal (and often a mental inability) to accept advanced educational qualifications. Instead we get a constant stream of excuses, attempting to justify maintaining the forty-year old status-quo. Medicine has evolved greatly in that time, but EMS is still doing things the way they've always done them. Yet, we sit around and complain that we don't get enough respect. The scary thing is that so many of can't figure out why. Oh well, the IAFF will fix it for us! And how can YOU expect to perform a surgical airway when you have never seriously studied human anatomy? Another example of the firemen ignoring the obvious realities. I guess reality isn't in the protocol book. News flash (sort of, actually it's been covered for 4 pages now): The original poster can NOT get experience. It is not an option for her. In fact, in the real world, most basics cannot obtain EMS experience, because there are simply no jobs for them. In better systems, basics are not even employed at all. It's been twenty-five years since I worked in an EMS system that hired basics. So what you are recommending is not only stupid, it’s just plain un-doable. I fail to see how encouraging the OP to do something that cannot be done is constructive. I dunno, maybe I learned that in college or something. Logic 101 FTW.

first of all i really don't care i am not not english teacher second my spelling and grammar doesn't effect any of the jobs i do you can sit back in the rear while people like me were up front in the theater and doctors are the last to talk about writing have you ever read some of there writing ya my writing sux but i am able to fight fire treat my pt's and i was able to support and defend my country any one with a problem with that i will challenge you to any of my skills i am sorry i suc at grammar and spelling but i have had a head injury and a torn acl defending my beloved country so buzz off