Chief1C

Only one way to find out.

I really want to hit you with a shovel.

Doesn't rice kill birds?

I never hesitate, ER doc's certainly don't. I went in for severe pain once, never found out what caused it. Just went away. Holy hell, yeah it hurts when you push, you push hard enough, it's gonna fricken hurt anywhere.

Back in the day.. ha ha.. when I first began, which was a mere 14yrs ago.. we covered a truly massive area. Went to the edge of our 1st due, more than 30 miles out and picked up a chest pain patient. An ALS Squad unit assisted, did an EKG didn't find anything...and released care. Sent us on our way to the ER, which by patient choice, was over 45min away. Pain came in waves, so I called a different paramedic unit to intercept. Just because. I went head to toe, b/c that's what I was taught. Felt something strange, it was like a balloon rapidly inflating and deflating, a balloon within a balloon. The vitals, as I recall, were relatively normal. Then the patient had a sudden onset of pressure in the abdomen, with pale skin, diaphoresis and hypotension. Medic got on, did the EKG, said, probably an MI, stop at the nearest ER. I suggested it was something more, which he sort of ignored b/c I was fresh out of the box. Described it. He felt. Met a chopper along the road. Patient survived his ruptured AAA. I've had several AAA patients, and I always thought - should I palpate or shouldn't I? Will it cause it to rupture? Usually, they were already ruptured.

I want to hit you with a shovel.

Well, make sure you get the bottle of generic pink stuff that says lead free.

Never heard of it.

Paint your side walk black, and put a massive stocking cap on your roof.

Does NAEMT count?

I wore a tee-shirt and shorts today, it was beautiful! Fifty-Three Degrees! It's like June, but sunnier!

OT Which is better for dehydration; NS or LR?

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Is that oral or rectal?

Here, lemme help you out. Slow. Quiet.

Good story.. some people are elated when lives are saved, some aren't. Took a man in, prolly fourteen years ago. Man was home w/ his youngest child, had no medical info written down, and the kid knew nothing - except how to dial 911. So, we get there, and he's pretty well grey-blue, fish out of water resps, pulse low enough to actually start CPR. The kid is calm and cooperative as could be, which worried me even more..b/c that just ain't normal. But just said he fell asleep. Do CPR on and off for damn near an hour and a half, the third person w/ us couldn't do compressions, so I was on cloud nine when the patient finally just woke up...after a second hit of Narcan. I'd been an EMT for two months, I was too new to know that was given. Now I know the ALS protocols as well as the BLS. Anyhewww.. The wife comes in, and I'm sitting in the waiting room doing my report, all red, sweaty..and in a brilliantly colored jumpsuit that had our name on the back. She asks if I was the person who worked on her husband, I stand up, and just as I sit the clip board down, she hauls off and punches me in the back of the head, then the nose with the other hand. Blood everywhere. The man had terminal cancer and OD'd on liquid morphine from the pain. She left for the night b/c it was planned, what wasn't planned was that the kid would call 911 before he was too far gone to bring back.The kid never told us he had cancer and he was so ashen and cyanotic, you couldn't tell he was yellow. Not even his eyes. Then when in cuffs, she realized his folder of medical info, normally on the fridge, was in her car.. I didn't press charges, but I haven't spoken to her since. Holy shit, I can't type, spell or form sentences this morning!

Did you ever have a night in a bar, and recall lots of pictures, and hope the next day that whomever took them doesn't remember who you are...so they can't tag you? Yeah.. I need a nurse now...banana bag.. and some zofran. Stat!

Purple Moose

I think it sounds horribly gross. I picture it like the taste of a powdery fiber supplement. I was taking various supplements and diet pills for a while, natural stuff.. I was never more sick in my life. I melted the fat away alright, and melted it away so often that there was quite a bit of bleeding associated. Not literally from the fat, just from...yanno.. the frequency. I Walk around the block now.. and in the country..a block isn't like a city block.

When I am REALLY tired, I hear voices. Like screaming voices, between the time I mehhh asleep and totally out. I'm mehhhh asleep... Confuddled. Hell, I woke up for a call this morning and sat there trying to figure out which foot my socks go on. ...................it doesn't matter... they're fricken socks.

I have an artificial disc, and had multiple steroid injections. Occasionally my ass and giggle berries go numb when I'm sitting, but seems to be okay. Not all its cracked up to be, I can lift, but carrying hurts. Actually, I think I have something else going on. B/c if I lift and carry, after I set w/e it is down, I immediately feel like I'm going to faint and it continues for several minutes. Dunno.. I prefer not to go to a doctor unless I feel that neglecting my self will result in death.

People - Turnout Gear is warm; rotate crews, warm them in the trucks. Bring in additional EMS units for cold weather rehab, assign a rehab officer to monitor personnel for signs of hypothermia. Don't be afraid to take someone's boots away if they look like they've had too much. Patients - Ready Heat II, forget heat packs, they'll fail below zero. Put the IV bags in Infant Warming pouches, also Ready Heat products. Shield the vehicle with a truck, if possible. Use the equipment gently. If hydraulic lines are going to fail, it's gonna be in the cold.

Whale penis?

What was this topic even about? Hal 9000 should build a virtual wall around EMT City to keep new people out. It's safer; that way nobody's feelings get hurt when they make their first post and everyone says hi, but makes them feel uber unwelcome. Lets hang up a banner - "We don't wanna get to know you, we don't care about your meaningless existence, everything you're doing is wrong!" Someone new comes along, posts: you spelled something wrong bad grammar poor word usage capitalization don't make new posts, what, do you think this is a forum? Search! I don't care if you've been an EMT for 25 years, I've been a paramedic for three months, so I'm better than you I'm going to show you how big of a prick I am by pouring myself into a bucket and drowning you in my ego Goddamn back button.. Thank the God that the psycho bitch up the street shoves down my throat every time she see's me trying to get into my car when I see her.... for that auto save feature. Now, I either need: Sleep Alcohol An Rx to help me sleep A bottle of the cherry flavored generic DPH and some Sprite Wow, yanno, I haven't have Sprite in a long time. Huh.. A gun To log off I don't have an 8

I like Pork.