Michael

And I thought he was addressing you!

Yet another reason to hold stabilization: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/4566319.stm

More than you wanted to know, at http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a980911a.html

But that's what we volly poegods do!

http://www.allheadlinenews.com/articles/7003223336

"The eye cannot say to the hand, 'I don't need you!' And the head cannot say to the feet, 'I don't need you!' On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor. And the parts that are unpresentable are treated with special modesty, while our presentable parts need no special treatment. But God has combined the members of the body and has given greater honor to the parts that lacked it, so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it." That's from a page of a whole prescription pad addressed to the residents of the Times Square of the ancient world, Corinth, composed by a certain Saul of Tarsus, who used the handle "Paul" online.

If you find yourself unaccountably feeling bad about yourself as a result of interacting with a person to whom you meant no harm, you may have encountered someone suffering from narcissistic personality disorder. This book http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/074321427...ce&n=283155 does nice job explaining how these folks operate and what to do about it. Not a perfect account, but very good. The author's explanation is that some of us when growing up are not taught to negotiate the inevitable experience of shame that starts when we are toddlers, the age at which we learn to differentiate ourselves from a world that it often more powerful than we are. Normal development includes screwing up, feeling bad, and being soothed by caregivers in a balanced way. Individuals who are either brutally shamed by adults and then left to their own devices afterward, and individuals treated with the other extreme, that is, those who "can do no wrong," consequently never learn to "manage" the shame that is part of every child's and adult's life at one time or another. Because they cannot tolerate it, they often very skilfully "offload" their shame onto those around them. In order to feel up they must put someone else down. (Sound familiar?) One way to do this is to become proficient (or at least licensed) in techniques that make others dependent on you, like, uh, emergency medicine -- but not only emergency medicine; there are jerks in every department of life, as we all know, and emergency medicine mostly attracts people for the right reasons I hope. A paragod sounds like a narcissist using a badge (a stethoscope can be a badge) as a shield against awareness of his own imperfection. Contrary to popular belief, this character is suffering not from an inflated sense of self, but rather lives in constant horror of being found out to be a crumb-bum, hence the posturing. 2500 years ago a fellow set out on a quest to acquire wisdom, and he found frauds and ignoramuses in all the professions. Then, "At last I went to the artisans, for I was conscious that I knew nothing at all, as I may say, and I was sure that they knew many fine things; and here I was not mistaken, for they did know many things of which I was ignorant, and in this they certainly were wiser than I was. But I observed that even the good artisans fell into the same error ... because they were good workmen they thought that they also knew all sorts of high matters, and this deceit in them overshadowed their wisdom; and therefore I asked myself ... whether I would like to be as I was, neither having their knowledge nor their ignorance, or like them in both; and I made answer to myself and to the oracle that I was better off as I was." That was Socrates, who so annoyed the paragods of his day that they executed him. So please be careful.

How fortunate that squads volunteering wisdom are still uncontroversial. Beautifully said, 8.

especially when compared to http://www.babycenter.com/costofchild/

But did anyone say "Do not try this at home"? http://www.gaumard.com/customer/product.ph...cat=0&page=

http://tinyurl.com/hwehc

Uh, "somebody" didn't say that, because "somebody" didn't even notice that. Looks like "somebody else" did, though. I know a lot of NEMT test-takers who would love that kind of speedy response, and maybe even that degree of accuracy.

112. Include enough funny items in a long list to force people who should be doing other things to read them all for fear of missing a laugh. Grrrr. :wink:

Or: Catch us while you can. Or: Still warm? Call us -- we're hot! Or: Stop us before it's too late. (I think that last one applies to me.)

Or if there are any dual-function ambulance/hearse rigs still operating: "At your service -- one way or the other!"

How about: Dying to go for a ride?

Here's the deal: In case of acute dysrhythmia, dysrhymia, and/or morbidly excessive gravity, make a donation to EMT City earmarked "Emergency Poetry Treatment Fund." When a critical mass of income has accrued -- that is, in about 350 years -- I will split the take with the site, leaving a generous commission. All merchandise and service "as is."

In the time I have to spare, I crave homage and respect. And because I love to dare Get tricky things correct, Because both well and sick Need rapid transport once per while; Because I get a kick Reducing others’ bile; Because in the odd hours While normal folks are sleeping, Instead of candy, flowers, I offer antidotes to weeping. And because I like the edge, And being treated like a hero, With or without a badge The fee I charge is zero. I worry, though! They say I’m putting good folks out of work; On call both night and day, I’m acting like a jerk. They say depressing salaries Is what I’m doing best; I’m robbing folks of calories To indulge my social zest. You think I ought to quit Supplying goods for free? Even when thanks come quite a bit More than I’d hoped to see? You think I’m stirring up bad will Unless I charge some money? You think I ought to send a bill For making folks feel sunny? Okay, I know: First do no harm, Regardless of how good Some find my work. My name as dirt? No. I’ll do what I should. From now on, no more freebies; I take too many jabs; I get the heebie-jeebies Being numbered with the scabs. You want my expertise and skill? Like any good commodity, Henceforth you’ll get with it a bill; I’m through being an oddity. Higher standards, solidarity, Dignified and fair; Instead of playing charity Where giving isn’t care. I’m done donating what should cost; I’ll charge, and you’ll know I’m Retrieving decency I lost On inadvertent crime. Pros in a field I joined for fun Who have resented me Will gladly learn I’m not the one To work without a fee. I trust all are relieved to know I’m taking down my shingle; I’ll no more blush from feeling low; My face will cease to tingle. I’m turning in my tools of trade. …Well, there’s really only one, And it’s not meant for first-aid, But rather verse and pun. That is, I’ll stop this selfish game Of writing words for free; I’ll stop the race for glory and fame And start to charge a fee. Auxiliary cop or emt, Philanthro-firefighter? I’ll no more donate lines to thee; My heart’s already lighter! A volly poet? Nevermore! The pros have changed my mind, If you want laughs, come to my store And buy my verses rhymed.

Ah, rebuttals, or at least explanations. 1. I learned to point at my wrist when asking a stranger what time it is on a noisy, busy city street so that s/he wouldn't mistake my question for "Do you have a dime?" 3. The original thought was "Eat your cake and [then] have it." Outside emesis, wishful thinking. 4. The original thought was "...last place you would look." 5. True love. Your neighbor wants to make sure you benefited from the view and is ready to explain what you missed. 6. At the supermarket, Sam runs into the lawyer who lives next door. "Say, George, how are you?" "Fine." "George, how much do you lawyers charge?" "Three questions for $200." "Wow. That's pretty steep, isn't it?" "Yup. That'll be $200." 7. You're right. 8. "What the Hell" is exactly what some people may have in mind. 9. You're right again (So what else is new?)

Topic hijack! Topic hijack! Well, not really, since your funnies rely on your signature. Well, not your signature, Lisa Alther's signature. Well, not even Lisa Alther's signature. "It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it." -- Aristotle (384-322 BC) Okay, back to rulership.

The guts it takes to post a post! You haven’t done your topic search? They’ll fry you first, and then you’ll roast. (Your question’s hanging in the lurch.) The guts it takes to post a post! You haven’t first asked Mr. Google? You’re only asking them to boast How wastefully you fret the frugal. The guts it takes to post a post! Your spelling’s off? Some grammar lost? Mispunctuating? Thought you’d coast On our indulgences? At our cost? The guts it takes to post a post! Typed all in caps? Fuhgeddaboudit! Your fortunes here have turned to toast; You and the keyboard you rode in on, routed. The guts it takes to post a post! Your topic strayed in some wrong forum? You may as well have been a ghost For all you’ll see of our decorum. The guts it takes to post a post! You’re safer rushing into fire, Bullets, high voltage, a rocky coast Than the City and its members’ ire. The guts it takes to post a post! These pros who handle healing Will triage-tag you black before most Folks would ask you how you’re feeling. The guts it takes to post a post! No room here for the wary; You’ll quickly, properly be dosed, With cures so strong, they’re scary. The guts it takes to post a post! And the only way to win Is learn, learn, learn; become a host And welcome newbies in. Wishing us all a therapeutically Foolish April. :wink:

Well, I for one had thought it was intentional, so I was satisfied then and am satisfied now. I'm easy!

http://www.museumofconceptualart.com/accomplished/

I took it to be his nice way of trying to tell someone to dry up, and to which a response could be, Thanks for the sediment.