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YEAH you tosser!

Yeah, I can't tell you how many times I've lost a patient while I thrust my BVM to the sky and shouted "IF ONLY I HAD AN EMT HERE!!! IF ONLY I COULD REMEMBER MY BLS TRAINING!!! OH WOE IS ME, I CURSE THE DAY I EVER FURTHERED MY EDUCATION!!!", and then it starts raining and lightning bolts start coming down from the sky and stuff. It's all very dramatic. This goddamned phrase has been so overused that I am at the point of considering small scale airstrikes to put an end to it. Yeah, I'm sure sometime it was cute when you found the paramedic's keys that he had dropped in the fracas and saved the day and got a pat on the back and had a good laugh about it, but just like your niece breaking wind at Thanksgiving dinner, the first time is cute but it gets old really, really quickly. Oz, I love the term 'tosser'. I'm procuring it for my own purposes.

Them's fighting words. Rule #40: Anyone who says EMT's save paramedics has a lightbar duct taped to their Yugo.

Oh where to start, where to start... Okay, let's start with the paragod complex thingy. Its a sad, trite arguement, but I'll bite. First of all, a nurse's job and a physician's job are completely different. A nurse's job is to care for the patient and make sure they recieve the appropriate treatment that has been prescribed for them, among other things. A physician is a scientist who specializes in the human body and its processes. A better arguement would have been "Not all nurses want to be nurse managers or nurse practioners," and to that I would say if we brought the lowest level of provider in EMS up to the standard of RN, I would not ever complain again about people not wanting to go further. Seriously though, and I hate being put in the position of saying this, because I have many friends who are EMT's and I respect them, but being an EMT is lifting, driving, CPR, first aid, and vital signs taking. In the grand scheme of professions, it is harder to get your CDL then it is to get your EMT. So in that aspect I am very suspect if someone's major accomplishment in life was passing the EMT course and then they want to settle in to that for the rest of your life. If you never had the ambition to go further than EMT, than usually ambitions such as quality assurance, going the extra mile, and keeping the ambulance tidy usually go right along with it. If its Again, this isn't a slam against EMT's, this a personality profile of the typical person who is a career EMT. Generally speaking if it's "Screw being a paramedic, I'm getting paid as an EMT" then usually, "Screw carrying the cardiac patient, I'm getting paid anyway" goes right along with it. If you think there is a flaw in this reasoning, please, feel free to share it. Okay next, you attack my reasoning about the toll it takes on a person doing this job. If you never have the joy of slipping a disk and then finding out exactly how the community you worked so hard to help will turn their back on you, be grateful, because I know a lot of people who thought being a volunteer firefighter or EMT was the greatest thing until they got injured and now survive on welfare. If you've never been through physical therapy, then don't even try to give me the pseudo tough guy "go be a florist" crap. Oil workers are well compensated and the physical toll of their job is taken into account. People need oil just like they need EMS, so I don't see why anyone who does this job shouldn't be protected the same way. My model of course took many liberties and was used just to illustrate a point, that all things considered, professional, paid ALS is not that expensive for a community. I have also said there are communities that would benefit from volunteer first response as opposed to nothing. However, most communities that utilize volunteer services could well afford paid EMS, such as Long Island, as ERDoc noted, and the only reason they don't is because of stubborn, arrogant volunteers who's need to be a hero outweighs the health and safety of their community.

For all those who are saying "My town can't afford...", lets break it down at a community level. Someone quoted to me that the cost of running a 24 hour ALS response ambulance staffed by two paramedics is around $1,000,000 a year. I think that may be a little high, especially since the person was talking about in the greater NYC area where prices of everything increase substantially. But lets use $1,000,000 a year for round the clock ALS service and transport. Okay, so if we broke it down evenly over a populace, which of course given tax rates wouldn't be the case, but lets say we break it down evenly over a populace, in a city of 20,000 people, the cost per person per year is $50.00. Yes, $50.00, or 13 cents a day per person to have round the clock, professional advanced life support at your beck and call, and that doesn't even take into account the fact that unlike a police or fire department, EMS can actually generate some of the revenue back. Certainly not $1,000,000 a year, but enough to defray a good portion of the funding. For instance, if you averaged 3 calls in a 24 hour period, your call rate for the year would be 1,095 calls for the year. If you billed $500.00 for each transport and only half the people or their insurance company ponied up the dough, you would generate $273,750 dollars a year. This leaves your operating costs at $726,250, or $36.31 per person per year for the ALS service, or roughly ten cents a day. Now, I ask you, is it really all that expensive to go paid ALS? And to be perfectly frank, if a town of 20,000 people doesn't want to pony up ten $.10 to $.13 cents a day to have me risk my damn neck, wreck my knees and back and leave me with a headful of bad memories, then honestly, f--k them. If they want something for free, I will gladly say "I told ya so!" afterwards. Oh, and as Lt. Columbo would say, just one more thing sir. I have never understood this. If you don't want to be a paramedic and do all you possibly can to treat the sick and injured, why exactly did you get into EMS? I mean, if you have true desire to help others by providing prehospital emergency care, wouldn't you want to be able to do all you possibly could for your patient? Doesn't it bug you just a little that your patient may be suffering or even dying because of your lack of skills? This really isn't a slam against EMT's. It's honestly something I never quite got.

Improve hiring standards for paramedics. Improve education for paramedics. Make everyone a paramedic. Banish volunteers. Pay us more. That should do it.

You know, not that I don't agree with most of the sentiment on the list, but once I get some rest, I'm coming back with my tips for b---chy ER nurses. You need to have a balance for life. Tips like: Just because you are half my height and I'm a man doesn't mean I am the one to vent all of your repressed rage on towards the men who were bigger than you and treated you bad in your life. We have psychologists for that. If you didn't bother to learn anything about the prehospital care system in your area while working in the Emergency Room, don't get mad at me if I look at you like you're dumb when you ask me a dumb question about what I can and can't do. If I am out of breath when I come through the doors, that's a good sign the patient needs immediate attention. Vital signs are courteousy. Don't abuse the courteousy. If you don't like your job, find a new one. Thank you for leaving your personal issues at home. I don't care how many years you've been doing your job. Get up from behind the desk. Try as I might, darn it, I just can't make things look as pretty as you can when I'm working in mud, blood and crack vials as you can in the middle of a brightly lit, climate controlled, non moving Emergency Room with some soft music playing, so cut me a little slack. Call me an ambulance driver and I'll call you a candy striper. Okay, I'll think of some more, but those were pretty good.

From what I know, there is no national standard for housing areas. So long as they abide by local housing and zoning codes, which is usually things like insulation, heat, hot water, etc. They could pretty much have you sit in a warehouse with cots and tell you to make due. Remember, there are those of us that sit in the ambulance at post for most our shifts.

Dwayne, feel free to tell your classmates that I said they are all a bunch of morons who couldn't run a call if House MD and Dr. Carter from ER were there holding their hands. You don't learn medication doses on the street.

Actually I grew up on a farm and did hay every summer, wrestled many and animal, and I still don't think its very funny.

-5 points for quoting "common knowledge" as actual fact. If you'd like to discuss local traffic laws and the judciary system, please, quote your state statutes and/or local ordinances. Can anyone specifically tell me where it says "only them letter carriers can run red lights"? Where did this come from? I'm curious now. Okay, lets not hijack the thread. Back on topic. Firemonkey: dumb, very dumb, the only thing that would have made it better if the "emergency transport" was a 42 year old with abdominal pain. No, no, no, no, wait, vollies usually don't get all riled up over abdominal pain. Ten dollars said it was a pediatric call. Them boys go crazy everytime they hear a peds run.

I dunno, its not even much fun any more. My well is dry for witticisms. I'm gonna have to reach here. Okay, I think I got it. Shira, if your patient is having a heart attack, do you think at least THEY would prefer you were working with these a brand new medic rather than an experienced EMT? Whatcha say? You know, lets not confuse dedication with lack of ambition. Sure, there are the occasional EMT's who are happy where they are, good at what they do, and everything is all well and good. I'm not arguing that point. However, I will say that typically if some has been an EMT Basic for over 20 years or so you'll find they have a bit of a lack of ambition in life.

We have a FAQ forum? I really gotta start paying attention around this place.

Yeah... heavy on the kitsch, light on the humor. They teach you how to fly AV-8B's back there on the ranch too?

Okay, so I was thinking, yeah, yeah, I know, surprising, isn't it? Anyway, I was thinking maybe this site could use a different kind of "FAQ". Our "Frequently Asked Questions" document covers topics about the site, but jeez louise if we don't get the same questions on this forum. Now, I realize that if people are too lazy to hit the search button they are probably too lazy to check out a secondary "Frequently Asked Forum Questions" list, but I say, hope springs eternal, and why don't we give it a shot? Here are the questions that I think we could all benefit from writing up into a formal, auxillary FAQ document: 1. How do I become a flight medic/nurse? A. This one has been done to death. How about some of you flight dudes and gals write a nice, summarized, an concise paragraph about the ins and outs of flying around in a helicopter? 2. How do I become an FDNY EMT? A. Yep, I'm tired of answering this one. I would be more than glad to write up a paragraph with the hiring standards, numbers, requirements, etc. if it will get people to stop positing. 3. How do I become a tactical medic? A. We need to get a good answer on this before someone writes someone says something they'll later regret in their reply. 4. Should EMT's be allowed to do XYZ procedure? A. I think this question takes the cake on fights, name calling and moved furniture more so than any other topic. Lets come up with a paragraph that nicely summarizes the debate that everyone can agree on and no one goes to bed angry. 5. What advice can you give for a new EMT-B? A. We'll come up with our best words of wisdom and make it sound good. 6. How can I get used to bloody, icky and gross stuff? A. I have no good answer for this. Either you can handle the job or you can't is my philosophy. Someone else could probably come up with something good. Okay, so, these are some of my questions that I think could be of use in a new FAQ. Comments?

Dude, do you read the forum at all before posting? Try it, just once. You'll like it, I swear.

At least Scatrat is on my side when it comes to the "New Jersey's EMS system SUCKS" debate.

You know, I think OSHA might have something to say about responding to another call without being properly BBPed and such...

Personal parachute, at least.

Yeah, that's not cool man. There's a reason you have to pay to take EMT class, instructors make money off of their knowledge and teaching abilities. Recording them and broadcasting it without there permission is tantamount to stealing.

Someone tell me the Dukes of Hazard theme was playing during this fiasco. Or at least something on a banjo.

That would be the latter, chief. Don't say the wrong things around the firemen. They're sensitive that way. WAAAAHHHHH I DON'T WANT EMS PEOPLE IN MY HOUSE!!! I'M A FIREMEN AND I ONLY WANT FIREMEN AROUND!!! WAAAAHHHHH!!! You get the drift.

There union's big sticking point on Mensa Medics are these: 1. You increase both the responsibility of the medics and the EMTs without an increase in pay. 2. There are several ways of getting more ALS ambulances to more ALS calls without the Mensa medic program. Improving the goddawful scripted protocol dispatch system would be the first step. 3. Less overtime for paramedics. 4. The logical step after one paramedic/one EMT team is 1 paramedic/firefighter and 4 CFR's. I'm not so much against the program, actually, there are many times where I wish I was working by myself. But the fact remains is that they are doing this for monetary reasons, not for patient benefit.

New York City Paramedic training turns to real-life emergencyBY CARL MACGOWAN Newsday Staff Writer January 20, 2007 A training session for fire department paramedics turned into a real-life drama Friday when one of the students went into cardiac arrest. Three paramedics from Long Island and a lieutenant from Howard Beach sprang into action and stabilized the student, Jeffrey Sanger, possibly saving his life. Sanger, 39, of the Bronx, was in stable condition Friday night at Long Island Jewish Medical Center in New Hyde Park. "The guy was in the right place at the right time," said Lt. Arthur Lester of Howard Beach. Sanger was among a group of 11 paramedics in the second week of a 14-week paramedic training program at Fort Totten in Queens. He was in the locker room preparing to begin the day's session when he was overcome by chest pains and what felt like heartburn, and he was extremely pale and sweating, Lester said. But he was in denial. "He hid it from everybody, but he eventually told me," said Patty Slavic of Maspeth, the lead instructor of the program. Sanger collapsed, prompting paramedic instructors Peter Auricchio, 38, of Holbrook, Karen Mangal, 38, of Elmont, and Joseph Hudak, 43, of Freeport, to rush to his aid. He had no pulse and had stopped breathing. One paramedic administered cardiopulmonary resuscitation before Auricchio shocked him with a defibrillator. Sanger regained consciousness and vital signs before he was taken to the hospital. "He had a seizure and then had a cardiac arrest," Lester said. "Maybe a minute or two after we shocked him, he started to breathe ... and a minute or two later he was talking to us." That made her day, Mangal said. "I'm glad came to work," said the mother of two. "I had the opportunity to save a life directly." Please join me in a round of applause for the above mentioned paramedics, who are all great guys to boot. They saved one of our own. =D>