Happiness

Had nothing to do with racism at all,and if you took it that way well that is your interpretation. If you read the discription "it what is lost in translation" and some of them are funny. And really with all the man bashing jokes I'v put on here, this offends you? And if any one reads my post I already appologized if it offended any one.

http://www.engrish.com/most-popular/ i haven't gotten past number 10 so if this site offends anyone ya sorry about that, but some of these are pretty funny.....enjoy

After being married for thirty years....a wife asked her husband to describe her. He looked at her slowly...then said, "You're A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K." She asks..... "What does that mean?" He said, "Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous, Hot. She smiled happily and said...."Oh, that's so lovely..... What about I, J, K?" He said, "I'm Just Kidding!" His eye is still swollen....but it will get better...............

THE CREATION A little girl asked her mother, "How did the human race appear?" The mother answered,"God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and so was all mankind made.." Two days later the girl asked her father the same question.. The father answered, "Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved." The confused girl returned to her mother and said, " Mom , how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?" The mother answered, "Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his."

Ausculation there was no weezing only stridor. The weirdest thing was that it came in waves of attacks, he would recover to some degree and then just crash. As it turns out they think that it was his larynx area that was swelling. He spent a few days in hospital and the was able to go home.

Paged code 3 for SOB We get there to find a 45 yr old male proped up against the wall of a building in obviouse respitory distress. Witness states man came inside to registar for a flight home, all of a sudden he ran outside and started to dry heave, he became pale and was helped to the ground. The pt is able to say that he had a history of Diabetes (insulin dependent) and asthma (he dosnt remember the last time he had an attack). He states that he was out partying last night and was drinking but deny's any drug use. Pulse was 103, breaths were 16 and it sounded like a bit of stridor,SP02 was 95, eyes 3 and reactive. The pt is flushed in his face. It took about 10 min to convince this guy that he wasn't getting on a seaplane in this condition and that he needed to see a Dr. My partner did a blood glucose and it was 13.6 the pt said that it was a normal for him, and we got the ventolin on him and into the back of the car in a sitting position. As I was climbing in, he leaned over and started to gasp for air, it appeared that he was going to heave but nothing was comming out, then he went limp. (We are now on our 3 minute ride to the ER) He accepted an oral airway and his breathing started to even out. I started to expose his chest to see if there was anything to see, there was equal rise and fall and no signs of trauma. As we are going into the ER he kind of wakes up enough to talk to the nurse. I was doing my report and as I was discribing the onset he started again. I pointed it out to the Dr. and off he goes. This guy did the same thing afew times more but we left before we could find out the results, they were even exraying his chest to see if he had a partial obstruction. Today I talked to the other medic who happen to have a busy night last night and was able to talk to the guy, he said his last memory was going into the building and standing by some girl who had alot of perfume on, as soon as he smelt that off he went. The Dr said that he may have had an allergic reation to the odor that brought on an asthma attack. Interesting to say the least

It goes away with time. I to am from a small town where I know almost everyone and everyone knows me. The decomposing body smell is horrid and the memories at bed time suck. I have a small bottle of vicks and when I go to one of those up the nose it goes. One of the worst bodies I went to was a guy who had passed away sitting on the couch, and his chin was on his chest. When we went to move him his head moved and it was like he had taken a breath. Oh course I was holding his head and it startled me so much that I almost dropped him. And then the gasses that had been brewing were released and yep Im glad I had the vicks, my partner didnt believe in using it and needless to say he was puking in the bushes (thank god he made it outside). If you still have problems then find someone in your station to talk about it sometimes thats all it takes. I still have bad dreams about a call I had back in January but they are not as often and not as intense. Good luck sometimes this job just sucks

'Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?' Mom replies, 'No, because she is in heat.' 'What's that mean?' asked the child. Go ask your father. I think he's in the garage.' The little girl goes to the garage and says, 'Dad, may I take Belle for a walk around the block? I asked Mom, but she said the dog was in heat, and to come to you.' Dad said, 'Bring Belle over here.' He took a rag, soaked it with gasoline, and scrubbed the dog's backside with it to disguise the scent, and said 'OK, you can go now, but keep Belle on the leash and only go one time round the block.' The little girl left and returned a few minutes later with no dog on the leash. Surprised, Dad asked, 'Where's Belle?' The little girl said, 'She ran out of gas about halfway down the block, so another dog is pushing her home.'

luv these guys

Costco doctor! One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a doctor." "Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies "There's a diagnostic computer down at Costco. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars - A lot cheaper than a doctor." So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Costco. He deposits ten dollars and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample... He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity.. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Costco.." That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample from himself for good measure. Joe hurries back to Costco, eager to check the results.. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results . The computer prints the following: 1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9) 2. Your dog has ringworm.. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7) 3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab. 4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours.. Get a lawyer. 5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better! Thank you for shopping @ Costco!

dont know how it works there but here if the pt is out of the building it's a EMS call......

All of the above or your neighbour is pulling a fast one on ya lol, remember you blacked out.....do you know for sure it is all the truth.

I can honestly say you make my head hurt. So you totaly missed the point of the OP. Scene saftey is the first thing we as paramedics tend to become compliant with, and I as a medic that has been around for a long time will admit to that. I have lately been trying to make sure the new ones comming down the pipe are aware of it all. It isnt always a violent person, your saftey can be anything. http://www.ctvbc.ctv.ca/servlet/an/local/CTVNews/20101020/bc_paramedics_101020/20101020?hub=BritishColumbiaHome It is now policy that we state our employee numbers when we answer a call. In this case they didnt even know the names of the crew involved. Also it is not good practice to be sleeping on the cot while your partner is driving. You should be both in the front keeping each other awake. Also let it be know that the stretch of the highway is horibble and there will always be questions on the cause. http://www.newswire.ca/en/releases/archive/July2007/06/c4458.html You cant always see the hazard, smell or sense it. We dont go into any confined space EVER. http://www.apbc.ca/fallen-members/ Could all of these one's been prevented. The ones that died in the medivac were ITT and everytime I go through my hospital I look up at the plaque dedicated to them and wonder if the pilots did something different these people would be with there families today. Flamming if even there is One PREVENTABLE accident in the millions of calls everyday, it is one to many......... Just saying................

That is halarious, it really made my day, I should print it out for the station meeting lol so they know how they should be, Great job

We have our first or last name, not both. It wouldnt really matter here as every one knows who we are and were we live.

Let me know how it is.

As I have mentioned previously in posts our community is experiencing a high death rate. Most of these deaths are cancer, old age and just those things that happen in life. Since January of 2011 our islands have lost at least 30 people which works out to a funeral a week. I havent attended all of them but I have attended most of them, it just becomes depressing after awhile. I would like to share the Eulogy of Mrs. Faith T. She was a second generation of our community and she was one of the most respected people here. She taught our children and she taught us about children, if there was ever an advocate for the young or the old Faith was it. She was accepting of everyone, Faith’s Eulogy Thank you for the opportunity to speak on behalf of my family. Faith was our adopted mother and god mother to our boys – Ashwyn and Balan. We have been loved, by Faith and Jack for six year now. Vanita was welcomed first – as Faith’s doctor - during the first of Faith’s many “bumps in the road” with her health. Faith and Jack attended our wedding, giving us their full support. They believed that our love – and our growing family – was to be celebrated. Their acceptance was soul-filling, and, we believe, set the tone in the way Masset accepted out son and our marriage. Faith aided us in our transition and initiation into motherhood. After Ashwyn was born – I began taking him to the hospital to cheer Faith up, and after she left the hospital, she and Jack continued our visiting tradition by having us over every Friday morning for coffee, snacks, and a visit to their sea wall. As a new mother – I was struggling. I was away from my family, brain foggy from lack of sleep, and felt like I was stumbling in my new role. Faith was patient with me, and my questions. She lent me her ear, offered me pounds of Kleenex, and my favourite – told me stories. She had a way of telling stories about her life that helped me feel like I wasn’t alone in my struggles with motherhood and small town life. When I was axel-wrapped about Ashwyn learning to crawl in the mud in the Chown River, while he ate it, with no diaper or hat on – she would smile and tell me stories of her not so proud mothering moments, so that I would know – no one is perfect. My two favourite stories were: the one when she – just to get a moment to herself, attached Jeffery to a leash and tied him to the clothes-line so that he wouldn’t run away. She ran into the house to grab her cigarettes, and when she came back – he was gone. His clothes on the ground and the leash empty. She found him blocks away, naked, in a construction site, feet dangling in a huge hole. The other one was about Kirk, and she was so sleep deprived that she got him down to his diaper, turned on the TV, put Kirk into the playpen and pushed it against the TV – covered him in newspaper and slept for an hour. Then after she woke up, he was covered in newsprint – she gave him a bath, and he and she – slept for two more hours. Faith also told us stories of their struggles with small town life – and as we listened - we learned valuable lessons about how to love your community and learn to live with difference, heartache and pettiness and still smile and say hello. It was awe-inspiring the way she loved and respected people – no matter who they were, or what they had done. Had I not had Faith in my life during those first few years with Ashwyn – I know the adjustment to motherhood would have taken much longer. When Vanita and I decided to move our family back to Ontario – we were sacred to tell Faith and Jack – we were so worried they would be angry with us. As I told them about our decision – I cried – and Faith held my gaze and said: “This is the best decisions for Ashwyn. He needs his grandparents. You will always be family to us – no matter where you are.” And, so we are. Faiths’ commitment and devotion to her family – in all its configurations – was and still is ahead of its time, and inspirational. Over the years, Vanita and I have watched – with the heartache of adopted daughters, and the worry of health care professionals – as Faith’s body gave way around her. Vanita would often remark at how unfair it was for someone as amazing as Faith, who gave so much – was to be given a body that would not live like her soul did – actively and joyously. Despite our grief at her passing, we are relieved that her body is no longer suffering. When someone like Faith dies, there is a hole left in the world. There seems to be a monumental vacancy on this earth as a result of her passing. Like this world is a little harder to live in now that she is gone. I say this not to depress, but to acknowledge the rich and full life that Faith had here in Masset, and to acknowledge the huge, positive, loving impact she had in her love for Jack, her family, our family’s and your family’s life, and in the life of her beloved Masset community. So, what rushes in to fill the void left by such a force as Faith? Our memories of her, and the legacy that comes as a result of those memories. As we leave here today, I would like to ask you: How will you honour Faith’s legacy? Will you choose to: - Cultivate loving-kindness by accepting others – just as they are – OR – choose a new adventure? - Will you love someone thru’ thick and thin for 50 + years? - Will you have strangers’ for supper – just because they are in town visiting your friends? - Become an educator? - Will you become a champion of children – OR – welcome a child into your home and feed them or make a sandwich for a hungry child – and give it to them? - Perhaps, you’ll volunteer. - Will you speak only kind words about others OR, not say anything at all? - Maybe you’ll laugh or cackle – OR – pick something new to try like Tai Chi. - Practice acceptance, not just tolerance. - Not be afraid of pain. - Will you cultivate a listening ear? - Maybe you will become more patient, or plant a garden. - Will you play with your children, without distractions and build pride in your family? - Perhaps, you will love your community, or become a keeper and collector of local history and lore? - OR - Will you see our community and worlds’ children as suffering, scare, tender and worthy – not as troubles to be dealt with – and open your heart and home to them? After we leave here today, if we could all look at that hole I spoke of, jump into it bravely, and pull from it a commitment to do one thing, or approach a situation or a person, the way Faith did – we will all be honouring her legacy. We will all rest a little easier, knowing we have honoured her memory – and, are continuing, as she did, to make this world a little easier to live in – one leap of “Faith” at a time. Thank you. So now that you have read this please be aware that woman that wrote this is a lesbian, in a committed relationship with an awsome Dr. and has given birth to 2 beautiful boys. When this service was over I went over to her and said "I want to tell you that I have to admire you both in the ability to be able to show true love to eachother" as through out getting ready for the service these two touched each other, hugged, and called each other honey and dear. In the Forums lately I have noticed alot of bashing of some sort to some people who are different. It takes people like Faith to show us how to be accepting of others, I was lucky to learn this while she was alive and I hope those who read this will take something from it or take part in the little challange that was brought forward. RIP Faith I know you are looking down at us all with that smile of yours.