Things not to say during a delivery.

[JPINFV]

http://xkcd.com/431/

[Don1977]

http://xkcd.com/431/

Thats just wrong, funny but wrong...lol

[firedoc5]

Oh, this could be endless.

Whatever you do, just don't whistle.

Before checking for crowning, just be sure they are pregnant.

"OK, come to Pa Pa."

"Does it hurt bad?"

"Now, if I remember right..."

[JakeEMTP]

Funny stuff!

I guess another thing not to say is, "Damn!"

I wish I had a camera with me last week when we had a student with us. We responded to a "Woman in Labour " call which apparently was the understatement of the year.

The look on the students face when my partner advised her that " Childbirth is a Basic skill " was priceless!

[AZCEP]

There's always the catch-all "WHOOPS"

[logos]

There's always the catch-all "WHOOPS"

If the whoops is preceded by dropping the baby, it must always be followed by the loud announcement "The baby is having a seizure"

[firedoc5]

"OK, mom. Let's sqeeeeze this puppy out."

"Did you ever see 'Rosemay's Baby'"?

"EEEEWWW, yuck!"

[Just Plain Ruff]

MY EYES MY EYES

Oh My god, what the F is that?

He's a slippery little bugger aint he?

He looks like an alien!!!!!

"Here's Johnny!"

Oh my god, oh my god

Oh my goodness Look at the size of his ..........

[firedoc5]

The mother of my god-daughter, while being "stitched back up", was asked if she wanted to have it done "regular" or "extra-virgin". It was a military doctor.

"Hold it! Wait!! Never mind, thought it was a breach for a minute there."

[Mateo_1387]

Sorry Dude, I dropped your pizza.

Oh Crap, I left the drugs at home, how's about I go ahead and take the money?

Oh, were talking about babies, my bad.