KeriEMTAZ Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 I am a newly divorced mother of two. I have thought about searching for relationships with others in the EMS field but dont know how to find them. What idea's do you all have?? Keri Bethard
spenac Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 Sorry as an old long time happily married man I have no clue. Be sure and use extreme caution about using the internet to find a new mate as some have been known to lie about themselves, even on this site :shock: . Honestly if I were to ever re-enter the dating game I would run a criminal and credit check on anyone before getting involved. I would also require a complete medical check up, don't want any creepy crawlys or other problems. And a complete mental evaluation. Call this a stupid idea but why not ask admin to start an EMS love connection area?
KeriEMTAZ Posted January 4, 2009 Author Posted January 4, 2009 Thanks. Its been 16 years and really I was only 18 when I got married. I know stupid!! He was my first and only boyfriend. Never dated before. So honestly it sounds stupid but I have no clue how to date! I know these days there are tons of creepy people out there! Good idea on the background checks and stuff. Not sure about asking the Admins to create a new board for this. Keri
itku2er Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 Well this isn't a dating site but if you google it you can find plenty of dating sites geared at EMS workers. Good luck on your journey Keri
Christopher.Collins Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 Just my personal opinion but I wouldnt start with co-workers. I dont want to light a tinderbox here in saying this but there can be enough drama in our line of work (or maybe just here in Connecticut). Ive seen alot of happy relationships work out within an EMS/Fire company, but the way rumors can spread Ive also seen an equal share of relationships hurt over it. In fairness though alot of thoes couples bring it on themselves within the work place. I would say just get to know people throughout your area in other services, ED's etc. Obviously dont make it look like your doing that for dating purposes :twisted: (sorry just being a smart a@@)As far as the internet dating thing is concerned, thats one small detail to be looking for in the ever expanding cyber world, especially if you want to look close by to you. I met my wife online so dont get me wrong good things can come from that way of meeting people, shes great and I love her to death. My one peice of advice though if you meet someone also in EMS... make sure you guys have alot in common. I dated a few fellow EMS'ers over the past years and its all we ever talked about. Its great sharing war stories and having a very cruicial thing like this in common (I say crucial because its nice to have someone understand what your going through on a bad day)... but that all means nothing if its the only thing you have in common. Anyways, Im sorry to hear your marrage didnt work out. Best of luck on the search for a new man lol And welcome to the city.
crotchitymedic1986 Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 I have to agree with Chris, although a relationship with someone else in EMS sounds enticing (you will have so much in common), I have rarely seen those relationships work. My opinion on the best way to meet someone is to rekindle a hobby or activity that you enjoy, and then go do that. For instance, if you love horseback riding, do that. When you get to the stable there will be single men there who enjoy the same thing. You have a similar interest, so it is easy to start a conversation (same holds true for bookclubs, theatre, hanggliding, dog shows, bungee jumping, musical clubs, car shows, church, etc......). If you dont have a hobby, you can adopt a new one, or maybe take a night class to learn something new.
Christopher.Collins Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 Yea what crotchity said... lol Hobbies deffinatley help. Thats how I met someone. Odd part is I was pulling an EMS standby for a hobby I had dropped out of because of other commitments. The girl I met there was there for the event so we had that in common and she just happened to be a Firefighter EMT as well. Interest died out over time though because of varying religious beliefes and I greatly questioned her care and compitence twords people through stories she told me. But regardless... if you have the time, just get out there. Before I got married I was very shy when it came to talking to people, but it does happen.
WolfmanHarris Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 I understand (somewhat) where you're coming from. I'm engaged to my high school girlfriend of seven years and one of my infrequent thoughts is that if we ever separated I have NO clue how adults date. I have lots of friends of the opposite sex (that's how I ended up with my fiance) but I don't understand dating. I rarely clue in when I'm being flirted with/hit on until after the fact and just carry on conversation. As far as dating within EMS, the first question that comes to mind is why would you want to? One of the best lessons I've picked up from some on here as a newbie is that EMS should not be your whole life. I've got some friends in EMS and it seems all we do is talk shop. That's great, but that's not what I'd want from a wife/husband. Understanding, sure. But I think I'd want to keep those parts of my life separate. What happens if you, or they start to burn out on EMS and that's the main thing you have in common? Not to mention dating someone at work; which I'd advise against in any field. In even my no experience I've seen a couple of very bad situations result from dating within the EMS workplace. One allowed an incompetent provider to stay on the road for longer than they should have. I'm not saying don't date in EMS, but I'm suggesting maybe don't go looking just within EMS. Then again it sounds like I have as much experience dating as you do and I could be talking out my rear for all I know. Best of luck all the same and welcome to the City.
Michael Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 I greatly questioned her care and compitence twords people But isn't that supposed to be a winning pick-up line? :wink:
Richard B the EMT Posted January 4, 2009 Posted January 4, 2009 I express uncertainty with job related "affairs of the heart". I recall several EMS couples ended up married, some who divorced, and at least one marriage that started in a VAC, but one half of the couple caused the divorce by getting involved with another EMT on a municipal service. I met my now 20 year "steady" at that same VAC. She was originally a "Paper Pusher", tried out as an "in house " first responder, and left the field, which I, obviously, am still in.
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