Lone Star Posted January 15, 2009 Posted January 15, 2009 While thumbing through the evening newspaper, I came across an article that, frankly, has me worried... We're all pretty clear on the 'speed dating' concept... Would you trust a babysitter with your children that you met using the same concept? It seems that a group calling themselves Sitter Socials has taken the 'speed dating' concept and adapted it to a way to 'interview' your nex potential babysitter. Sitter Socials claims to do 'background checks', but the service that they use only checks for verifying identity, and criminal backgrounds. The only 'catch' is that the 'criminal background checks' are only done in 37 states, and the District of Columbia. The states that they can check are: AL, AK, AZ, AR, CA, CT, DC ,FL, GA, ID, IL, IN, IA, KS, KY, ME, MI, MN, MS, MO, MT, NE, NV, NH, NJ, NC, NY, OH, OK, OR, RI ,SC, TN, TX, UT, VA, WA, WI If the potential babysitter comes from a state not listed, you're REALLY gambling with your childs safety and possibly their lives. Is it just me, or does anyone else see a 'problem' with this? http://www.sittersocials.com/faq.php#4
AnthonyM83 Posted January 15, 2009 Posted January 15, 2009 Well, background checks for babysitters usually does just mean criminal check, but that's pretty ridiculous that it's not in all 50 states. Or are the state checks in addition to the DOJ/FBI check that most agencies do (what I've had to do for EMS and elementary school jobs). The idea of speed babysitter interviews isn't that bad. It's more interview than you get with more babysitting services, isn't it? They just send you a random sitter....whereas this way you actually meet them first and get a vibe for them.
akflightmedic Posted January 15, 2009 Posted January 15, 2009 I do not see a problem. If you do not have family who can watch your kids, then you have to do everything possible to find an acceptable sitter. Some people can not afford daycares, and even those have had their issues of wrongdoing, not to mention they are day cares not night cares. I have used three different sitters and 2 temporary nannies from a website called babysitters.com. I had to pay to join the site, the sitters have background checks, pictures and references that you are allowed to call and check on. After selecting a few sitters, I then chat with them on the phone and meet them in person, as do the kids to make sure it is a fit. From there, I build a roster of 3-5 sitters I trust and can call at different times. I trust the sitter because I trust my kids. They know right from wrong, they know proper behavior and what is expected of themselves and of adults they interact with. I have fired sitters based on feedback from my kids and their comments were harmless in their minds, but I do not pay sitters to lay on my couch for several hours or talk on the phone while the kids play outside. My kids know I am serious with whom I entrust them to and I think they have developed a respect for that and appreciate it on some level. Therefore they are comfortable giving me honest, non malicious feedback. At some point Lone you got to get over the boogeyman fear. Maintaining awareness and respect for the unknown (in this case a babysitter's true personality) is good, but hyper awareness just drags you down. There are good people out there and parents should not be faulted for finding alternative caregivers, especially if they go to the extent of at least trying to obtain a background check. I would suspect that most evil doers would not rgister themselves with a site that is going to do a background check. They tend to pick their victims through alternative methods. It sure beats the heck out of tearing a tab from a flyer on the grocery store bulletein board.
Lone Star Posted January 15, 2009 Author Posted January 15, 2009 Let's be honest here....you can trust your kids all you want to, but trusting someone you've only interviewed for 3-5 minutes in a 'speed dating style interview' seems rather nonsensical. Look at all the videos we see released that were taken with the 'nanny cams'.... some of these people were employed by a reputable service.... I'm not saying that EVRERY nanny, babysitter, caregiver is going to turn out to be like what we see on these videos, but aren't we increasing the odds by the 'speed dating approach' to interviewing potential guardians of our children? Add to that that the so called 'background checks' aren't run in all 50 states, and even then, that doesn't give an accurate representation of the type of people that are trying to get the opportunity to take care of your children. Hindsight may be 20/20, but it's still too late to do anything about it!
CTXMEDIC Posted January 15, 2009 Posted January 15, 2009 Heres an idea. if you cant care for your kids without resorting to a 3 minute interview...STOP BREEDING!
akflightmedic Posted January 15, 2009 Posted January 15, 2009 If you are going to compare it to speed dating, then let us examine it from that approach. First, the 3 minute interview is NOT the only interview the people get. It is a chance for you to sit through several potential candidates and decide which ones you wish to talk to more in depth. It isn't like after 3 minutes, they say ok babysit tonight please. The same holds true for speed dating. You basically know within 3-5 minutes of meeting someone if you are interested, if you wish to sleep with them, or if you wish to do a follow up meeting/date and see if there is more to it. Also, you may feel one way and the other party feels differently. By speed dating, you do not waste an entire night suffering miserable company. It also helps you save face because right then and there they can say no thanks and it frees either side up to continue searching. I held multiple sitter interviews in my house during one day marathon. I guess I did my own speed nanny search. There were some that I was already saying no in my head as they approached the door. I looked at clothes, body language and then finally how they spoke. I then conducted the interview, got a little more in depth to make sure my impression was accurate or inaccurate, then informed them one of 2 things. No thanks or I will call you after I have seen the others. Again, I think you are taking this one way out into left field and being a little too harsh on people who may utilize this type of service. What do you suggest as a alternative? What is your alternative solution to a short interview with a partial background check? Do not just bring the problem to light, tell us how to fix it or suggest an alternative. Tell me the great idea, as I think this one is very effective. As for the inability to care for your kids without interviewing....are you even a parent? Are you suggesting parents do not conduct interviews so they can go out and have a life once in a while?
mrmeaner Posted January 16, 2009 Posted January 16, 2009 I'm pretty fortunate to have family in the immediate area that love to watch my boys (for free ) and to have a baby sitter / day care provider that we completely trust and loves our kids almost as much as we do. However, everyone does not have that option. There are bad people in every profession, and just because you don't have a conviction on your record doesn't mean you haven't done bad things. I'm not saying background checks are useless, but they're not the end of the search. If "speed dating" for baby sitters is the best option available then that's what you use. But as AK discussed, that isn't necessarily the end of the interview process. I would say that anyone looking for baby sitters in a metro area would be best off to follow the steps he uses. The only things that I would add is that all interviews and reference checks should be in person only and occasional surprise visits after hire wouldn't hurt.
AnthonyM83 Posted January 16, 2009 Posted January 16, 2009 I think the value of the speed interviews is overall vibe. You can get a LOT of info from a 3 minute conversation. Not enough time to throw them different scenarios, but it is to get sense of them as a person. Do you want this type of person influencing your kids? Maturity level? Manners? Pushover? Education? Etc. Yes, yes, 3 minutes isn't a lot, but the point is that it's MORE than a lot of sitter services give. Why knock em for doing more?
mrmeaner Posted January 16, 2009 Posted January 16, 2009 Another thing Anthony's post reminded me of is the location of the interview. When we interviewed our baby sitter, it was at her house and her kids were there. Seeing how her kids behaved. Actually they were the major reasons we went with her. For example, her 17 year old daughter asked before she took a Mountain Dew from the fridge and her youngest son came in from playing catch with his brother, grabbed a glass of water, washed the glass, and put it in the drying rack. These are things we never would have picked up on without being in her home.
chief darkcloud Posted January 16, 2009 Posted January 16, 2009 Im so glad i don't have to worry about babysitters anymore as it seems to get harder to find one that is reliable and competent. I have to agree with the other posters as in type of relationship you have in your life you always have that first impression good or bad. If you get a bad impression then move on and if a good one shows up get the number and then do a proper interview.
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