Grossest Jokes Of All Time ............

[crotchitymedic1986]

An oldie, but a goodie:

EMT Randy Rescue has not been scoring with the ladies, so he goes to the local brothel to purchase the services of a prostitute. The madam meets him at the door and asks what type of pleasure he is seeking. Randy says, "I'm just a poor EMT, so I dont have alot of money, I will take whatever women that I can afford". Madam asks how much money he is willing to spend, and Randy answers I only have $30.00. The madam says all you can get in this house for $30.00 is 15 minutes with Sandpaper Sally. He says, beggers cant be choosers, sandpaper sally will be just fine.

Amazingly, when he gets to sandpaper sally's room, he finds her to be very attractive. Sandpaper Sally helps him get undressed, then she lays him down on the bed, straddles him, and begins the sex act. Randy rescue screams out in pain. "I know why they call you sandpaper sally, you are killing me, i have never been inside a woman whose kitty was so rough". Sandpaper Sally apologizes, gets up, and goes to the bathroom. A few minutes later she returns, climbs back on top of him and asks, "Does this feel any better ?"

Randy says yes, that is way better, what did you do ? Sandpaper Sally replies, I just went in the bathroom and pulled all the scabs off.

Anyone got one that is more gross than that ?

[TDP]

Q. Why does the Easter Bunny hide all his eggs?

A. He doesn't want anyone to know he's been f*****g the chickens.

[BushyFromOz]

Whats the difference between menstraul fluid and sand??

You cant gargle sand...... :shock:

[akflightmedic]

Little Johnny ran into the kitchen where his mother was cooking, with his index finger extended and covered in gray goo and said to her..." MOMMY,MOMMY, I found the baby's soft spot!!!

[firedoc5]

What's worse than ten dead babies in a trash can?

One dead baby in ten trash cans.

[Just Plain Ruff]

What's worse than ten dead babies in a trash can?

one still alive, do you know what's grosser than that?

He's eating his way out, do you know what's grosser than that?????

He made it.

[Chief1C]

An oldie, but a goodie:

EMT Randy Rescue has not been scoring with the ladies, so he goes to the local brothel to purchase the services of a prostitute. The madam meets him at the door and asks what type of pleasure he is seeking. Randy says, "I'm just a poor EMT, so I dont have alot of money, I will take whatever women that I can afford". Madam asks how much money he is willing to spend, and Randy answers I only have $30.00. The madam says all you can get in this house for $30.00 is 15 minutes with Sandpaper Sally. He says, beggers cant be choosers, sandpaper sally will be just fine.

Amazingly, when he gets to sandpaper sally's room, he finds her to be very attractive. Sandpaper Sally helps him get undressed, then she lays him down on the bed, straddles him, and begins the sex act. Randy rescue screams out in pain. "I know why they call you sandpaper sally, you are killing me, i have never been inside a woman whose kitty was so rough". Sandpaper Sally apologizes, gets up, and goes to the bathroom. A few minutes later she returns, climbs back on top of him and asks, "Does this feel any better ?"

Randy says yes, that is way better, what did you do ? Sandpaper Sally replies, I just went in the bathroom and pulled all the scabs off.

Anyone got one that is more gross than that ?

Yeah, the real ending to that...

Oh I just reached in with my finger nails and pick at the scabs and just let the pus run.

[firedoc5]

one still alive, do you know what's grosser than that?

He's eating his way out, do you know what's grosser than that?????

He made it.

I forgot about that one.

[crotchitymedic1986]

What does a person with leprosy tell a prostitute ?

Keep the tip.

[crotchitymedic1986]

Door to door salesman is making a sales call in a woman's home. He notices a large bowl of peanuts on the coffee table, with a sign next to it that says "dont eat the peanuts". When the woman leaves the room to get her checkbook, he could no longer restrain himself, so he grabbed a big handful of the nuts and ate them before she came back in the room.

After taking her check, the salesman asks, "you know i just have to ask what is the deal with the peanuts, why would you put a bowl of nuts out on the table, and then put a note beside it saying dont eat them ?"

THe woman replies, oh those are grandpa's nuts, he doesnt have any teeth to chew them with, so he just sucks off all the chocolate.