DUMBEST THING EVER HEARD ON THE RADIO/SCANNER

[mshow00]

I have two involving the same medic

1. we got dispatched to a resp arrest the moment we come in service. we get there to find a woman laying in high folwers c and a&ox3 with a cpap going. My partner asked the SNF nurse why this came out as an arrest to which she replied with: her labs say she is crashing CO2 at 100% and O2 at 50-60%

2. the other he told me about yesterday, a guy's sister called 911 b/c he had a croche needle stuck in his rectum. accordingly it ended up poking out of his left check and had been that way for two weeks. needless to say it was very very infected. the pt states he "fell" on it... thing is this is the second time in a year that this has happened only last time it poked out of his right check...

[aryan51]

Dispatch: Medic 74, Code 3, Stockton map page 243 B Boy, 2331 2 3 3 1 Fake St, At the "Pretty Beauty Nail Salon", for a 63 y/o female, full arrest, your time out 13:32.

M74: 10-4, 74 enroute

Dispatch: Medic 74 be advised CPR is now in progress.

M74: 10-4

A couple minutes later...

Dispatch: 74, per fire on scene you can cancel, pt is conscious and ambulating, fire's getting an AMA.

M74: (Giggling) 74 copies, show us AOR.

What I would have done to be there to see that....hahaha!

[mrmeaner]

2. the other he told me about yesterday, a guy's sister called 911 b/c he had a croche needle stuck in his rectum. accordingly it ended up poking out of his left check and had been that way for two weeks. needless to say it was very very infected. the pt states he "fell" on it... thing is this is the second time in a year that this has happened only last time it poked out of his right check...

Appalachian Emergency Room

"Okay Tyler, what did you stick up your butt today?"

[jsadin]

Someone translate "Maine" to "Noo Yawkeeze: "Skiddah"?

Skiddah = Skidder = Log skidder

[Richard B the EMT]

Thanks, jsadin, this Noo Yawk Ciddyboy never wouldda guessed!

[fallout]

Heard on the PD channel during gay pride week:

All units, attempt to locate a male...uh...female...uh... shemale wearing a white dress in the vicinity of the undercurrent bar in connection with theft of a purse.

Another gem:

369 headquarters, clear the main, have an evading driver. 2 minutes clear.. resume normal on the main, he wasn't evading, just a retarded driver.

And, another PD call:

Respond to 69 and Wall on an undesirable. Caller advises, Ray Charles, black male is on location throwing beer bottles at people's head. No, not the blind ray charles.

[firedoc5]

"Good Sam., 5 Nora ??, ....we are attempting CPR but patient is fighting us." NO kidding. For real.

[katgrl2003]

"Good Sam., 5 Nora ??, ....we are attempting CPR but patient is fighting us." NO kidding. For real.

Actually had something similar happen to me a few weeks ago. Medic crew coming from an outlying hospital was asking for another medic because their patient just coded. My partner hopped in the back of their truck, and I followed in ours. Unloaded pt at ER, rode the rails into room.

Weird thing #1: Pt's chest would not rise after compressions.

Weird thing #2: Pt was pushing our arms away during compressions, but when we would stop, so would she, as she had no pulse, no respiratory effort. It was obvious she was trying to keep us away.

Weird thing #3: Pt WALKED out of the hospital one week later.

It's official. Patients are weird.

-Kat

[n0ssb]

Was K-89 Have a Burglary in progress, at the ranch outside of town, requests back up assistance--Wow today is your day--K10- and K-9 are enroute to help you

Thank you Dispatch for kindness...

K-89 was my car number in Victor Colorado Dispatch was the Teller County Sheriffs Office 8)

[firedoc5]

"10-4, 10-4" "1 Adam12 enroute, 10-4" - Some civilian got inside a car and started playing with the radio.