How did you handle your first lost?

[jafo]

I think we all worried about those parts of the job that we thought might give us a problem. It shoulld be pointed out that you never really know what will affect you until it happens. For instance, I have no problem with any of the "losses", even my second one, which was a close firend. I seem to handle that fine, as part of the job. However, soon after joining the squad, we did a dog rescue, elderly male dog mired in the middle of a small pond in mud. The animal was stuck in water up to his neck for hours before he was discovered. To make it tougher, the pooch was blind and deaf. Something about that incident got to me, and I have no damned idea why I get weepy everytime I think about it, even today. BTW, the pooch had a borken rib and a broken ankle. He made a full recovery.

The point is, when an incident affects you, you need to recognize it and deal with it in a postive way. This is what will keep you healthy and prevent burnout.

Keep an open mind.

Jafo

[bandaidpatrol]

Don't remember, it's been over 40+ years. Lost so many people in that time period, it's hard to remember any one-single death.

[Goose]

my first patient to die on happened early for me. i was 8 days into my first job. we were taking a patient to the city for surgery she was 90 had a DNR. i was driving my first time in the city had no idea where the hospital was so my partner had to jump up front every now and then to give me directions. i missed a turn and she ended up dying before we got her to her room. i was in the hall blamming myself when i partner came up to me put his hand on my shoulder and said "do you know why she died?" i thought he was going to reassure me that the missed turn didn't have anything to do with it and she was old next words out of his mouth "because you missed that turn"

[supersophie]

My first one was actually the first squad call i ever went on in my life. I had just gotten my EMT and for my senior project in high school I was riding with the local fire department. we arrived on scene to a purple patient and everything went downhill from there... Anything that can go wrong on a call like that seemed to go wrong. Throughout the entire call I was saying hail marys out the whazoo in my mind. I don't know why. It didn't really make a difference. The other people on the call were very frustrated by the time we left the hospital. On the way back to the station everybody was dead silent but as soon as we got back and started to clean the mess in the back of the squad (which looked like a bomb had exploded inside) people started talking. I think it was cleaning up afterwards and talking to the other people who were there that helped me the most.

[Summit]

my first patient to die on happened early for me. i was 8 days into my first job. we were taking a patient to the city for surgery she was 90 had a DNR. i was driving my first time in the city had no idea where the hospital was so my partner had to jump up front every now and then to give me directions. i missed a turn and she ended up dying before we got her to her room. i was in the hall blamming myself when i partner came up to me put his hand on my shoulder and said "do you know why she died?" i thought he was going to reassure me that the missed turn didn't have anything to do with it and she was old next words out of his mouth "because you missed that turn"

they were old, dying, had no DNR... thats why the lady died. the turn was irrelevant.

[bandaidpatrol]

my first patient to die on happened early for me. i was 8 days into my first job. we were taking a patient to the city for surgery she was 90 had a DNR. i was driving my first time in the city had no idea where the hospital was so my partner had to jump up front every now and then to give me directions. i missed a turn and she ended up dying before we got her to her room. i was in the hall blamming myself when i partner came up to me put his hand on my shoulder and said "do you know why she died?" i thought he was going to reassure me that the missed turn didn't have anything to do with it and she was old next words out of his mouth "because you missed that turn"

I'm sure he was trying to be funny. Often in EMS, we use humor to combat stress and avoid grief. We can't grieve for every patient we lose, it will burn you out and you'll never make it. I'm not saying humor is the best way to deal with it, but it may delay any type of stress or emotional reaction to the situation to a time when it may be more appropriate to critique the incident.

[Richard B the EMT]

Could the partner be disguising their own grief with the bad joke? It has been known to happen.

[Asysin2leads]

Just thought I'd add in, FDNY has an overtime cap. 2 days per week paid overtime, unless otherwise authorized, anything else is taken as comp time, or giving you hours to use at a later date for days off or vacation.

A big sticking point among members is that the department won't let you make more than 2 shifts a week overtime, and the union doesn't want you working anyplace else as a 911 EMT or medic.

[Defiant1]

my first patient that died on me was while i was still just an Explorer, the way i handled it was at first shock and wondering why i was doing this, then i remembered why i wanted to become an EMT, for a classmate of mine who died in a car accident. for any run that is really hard on me, i just think about her or go visit her grave, and that reminds me of my promise to her

[Just Plain Ruff]

My first 3 calls as an EMT were the following

1. Pediatric cardiac Arrest - SIDS

2. Adult cardiac arrest - save

3. Trauma code from pedestrian struck. Save

Those were my first three calls as a new emt just out of orientation. My first 2 shifts were with a seasoned emt and then I was on my own for my 3rd shift.