BS calls

[PCP]

So any other good BS calls out there that someone wants to share?

[ERDoc]

I had some young parents bring in their 4 day old because he hadn't pooped in 24 hours and was fussy and seemed to be really hungry after they fed him 1oz of formula.

We got called to a house once for a GSW to the chest only to find that the guy had a dream that someone was shot in his home.

Edited November 9, 2011 by ERDoc

[WolfmanHarris]

I had some young parents bring in their 4 day old because he hadn't pooped in 24 hours and was fussy and seemed to be really hungry after they fed him 1oz of formula.

We picked up a 40 y/o M who was worried because he hadn't had a BM in more than 24 hours and had low grade abdo pain. En route he remembered he had a BM that morning.

We got called to a house once for a GSW to the chest only to find that the guy had a dream that someone was shot in his home.

Not really a call but still funny; dispatched for man on roof shooting. Cancelled two minutes later, "Umm... typo on PD's end. Man on roof, shouting."

[RockDoc]

BS calls-----among many over the years, I remember best------------

One of those nights on 24 hour shift with about 18 runs under our belt. We were dead tired, really beat. Got back to the station bout 3 AM and just as soon as my butt hit the recliner, --tones go off and here we go again.

Went to an apartment complex, saw a guy waving to us. Went up to him and asked what was the problem. He was really swishing, playing the gay act to to the max., said "its my friend"

We went up to the apartment, opened the door and went in, thru the living room/kitchen and opened the bedroom door. The room was painted black, walls and ceiling and had flourescent painted symbols painted on the walls. In the corner there was a fish tank with one of those sucker bottom feeding fish swimming around making sucker motions with his mouth, flourescent bulb in tank. I looked over at the bed, there were head marks on both pillows so there was no doubt what was going on. On the wall above the bed were 4 paintings. The artist was very good, though the dimensions of some aspects of the painting were probably over-exaggerated. The first painting was of the guy in the bed with his partner, his heels above his head and his partner doing him in the missionary position. The second painting was the guy in the bed in a doggy position being breech-loaded by his partner. I never did figure out exactly what to call the positions in the third painting, but it was of the same nature. Be that as it may, it wasn't my business what they were doing, we were here to save a life...lololololo

I asked the guy on the bed "Whats the problem" He looked up at me ,gave a deep sigh, brought his hand up over his eyes and in the most Nellie voice I have ever heard said, "I just can't get to sleep"

At that point, being dead tired and sleep deprived myself, I snapped at him "Well, usually a piece of ass puts me right out" and I turned around and headed for the door before I realized that my last statement definitely meant different things to each of us. I just kept walking, went back to the unit, went into service and headed back to the station. No compassion at all from me on this one.

MORE TO THE STORY---- I just kept getting madder and madder that we would be called out to such a BS call. We had started the day out with an arrest and the day had just got worse, and now at 3 AM in the morning I was called to sing lullabyes or show tunes or whatever it would take to get this guy to sleep, and since I had the time in to retire, I decided that the next morning I was going to retire.

I went to the office the next morning and filled out all the paperwork for retirement, and at the end I had to sign and date it. That is when I realized it was Friday the 13th. I couldn't retire on a Friday the 13th, so I decided to put off retirement till Monday morning. I would up staying another 5 years until I retired.

[HERBIE1]

I could fill up volumes with BS calls- and YES, there are BS calls. When there is no penalty for abusing the system, when it costs you YOU nothing for the ride or the ER visit, there will be BS calls- and it will be a chronic problem.

Sorry, but that altruistic stuff about our purpose does not apply here. The E in EMS stands for something, and I defy anyone to explain how any of the patients below could be classified as an emergency.

Let's see off the top of my head:

-I ran out of bandaids and I need one for my finger

-I had a bad dream

-I'm upset and angry at my son because he won't do his homework

- I need a ride to the ER because I need my prescription refilled

I could go on for hours...

[Richard B the EMT]

In all cases, it is NOT our emergency, but may be percieved by the caller as one. for example, I recall one idiot on CB Radio channel 9, the designated emergency channel on CB in the US, arguing with a frequency "monitor" that talking with another radio operator a thousand miles away, because they were that distant, constituted an emergency! *

*FCC rules and regulations for CB actually forbid a communication over 500 miles, or even a message relay over that distance.

(I'm in NYC, and have someone in LA. Riiiiiiiiiiight, I didn't realize it was 6,000 miles distant, not less than 500 miles)

[Kiwiology]

I had some young parents bring in their 4 day old because he hadn't pooped in 24 hours and was fussy and seemed to be really hungry after they fed him 1oz of formula.

So would you as one of them funny sounding Consultant Physicians tell them to take their kid somewhere else? Wait, you are a Consultant Physician aren't you? Now that we think about it, I am too, why not, it's not that hard right?

What, they can't sit in Minors for 8 hours and see the dangerously overworked, underfed and fatigued House Officer with no training in paediatrics?

Edited November 9, 2011 by kiwimedic

[ERDoc]

So would you as one of them funny sounding Consultant Physicians tell them to take their kid somewhere else? Wait, you are a Consultant Physician aren't you? Now that we think about it, I am too, why not, it's not that hard right?

What, they can't sit in Minors for 8 hours and see the dangerously overworked, underfed and fatigued House Officer with no training in paediatrics?

Yeah, I'm one of those silly consultant physicians. Nope, not that hard. You don't have to know the answer, just how to find the answer. I was working at a single coverage, rural hospital at 4am. There is no Minors or house officers. I'm the only doc in the hospital.

[Paramagic]

Sorry voranus, those are real calls. HLPP, give me a list of examples of your definition of BS calls, I will prove you wrong.

Code 3 response. Arrive at residence. What seems to be the problem? Answer: I'm out of cigarettes, can you go down to the store and get me some?

I'm not sure how being too lazy to buy your own cigarettes is an emergency.

[Just Plain Ruff]

Code 3 response. Arrive at residence. What seems to be the problem? Answer: I'm out of cigarettes, can you go down to the store and get me some?

I'm not sure how being too lazy to buy your own cigarettes is an emergency.

Because if he got too far into nicotene withdrawal he would be very anxious and irritable and then it woudl be an emergency with a chief complaint on anxiety so he needed those cigarettes NOW!!!!!!!!!

And I call BS on your BS call - ha ha ha get the pun?

Edited November 9, 2011 by Ruffems