DwayneEMTP Posted October 15, 2012 Posted October 15, 2012 I've had this thought stuck in my head for a couple of months now, with no real progress being made. As we've had some pretty good non EMS related conversations here, I thought I'd throw it out for your thoughts. I'm going to paste a link to my blog as an explanation. It's not a great blog and this link has errors in it, in fact maybe more errors than not, but I think it shows my thinking, as far as it goes. I'm curious to see what you think, and how you feel, about this... http://www.chasing-my-life.com/is-a-beautiful-child-more-valuable-than-one-less-beautiful/
Mateo_1387 Posted October 16, 2012 Posted October 16, 2012 Is this in any way an indication that we arbitrarily judge others? Is a pigs pussy pork? I think so. I believe I can understand where you are coming from in your questions. I have asked the same types of questions. Why does this poor person affect me more than the others I meet? Why do I feel more compassion towards certain types of people? So far, the conclusion I have reached thus far, is that all people judge. Your religion may command no judgement. Hell, many are taught to be judgmental. Others may not even realize they are doing it. Take for example judging another person's appearance and instinctively linking that to sensing of possible danger. I'd be willing to bet that having children makes a parent's judgement of others exaggerated. Culture, experience, marketing, and biology, as you have already identified, makes sense as far as influencing judgement. I'm not so sure the alien mind probing influenced your thoughts, but, it could have happened. Man, do you really think that you thought she deserved more than the other children surrounding her? Or could it have been a knee jerk though based solely on someone that caught your eye. Its hard to imagine you think the other children deserve their situation, but maybe in comparison to this child, which in ways stood out, brought you to think of their situation, more so than you normally would?
RuralKSEMS Posted October 16, 2012 Posted October 16, 2012 I try really hard not to judge another person as you don't know what their personal situation is (unless you really do). I also try really hard not to gossip for the simple fact that lies are hurtful and can do damage to things that you don't realize. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, I really try to believe that. I also try to teach my children (my daughter especially because girls are mean) that it doesn't matter what they look like, how they dress, or what they do as long as it's legal and that it makes them happy. If people can't like you for who you are, then they don't need to be your friends. Period.
DwayneEMTP Posted October 16, 2012 Author Posted October 16, 2012 Please don't say pussy... Great points Matty. Maybe it is that simple, that she caught my eye and the feelings that anyone would have about kids living in this way were focused on her then? Maybe, through impotence for being able to direct greater change our minds focus on a single change instead, and that focus is directed at whatever is most familiar? I didn't think of that before...her thin nose is out of place here, maybe it's simply the shape of her nose that made me feel that she didn't belong, and nothing deeper at all? I get that RK, but this isn't about our conscious judgements really. Do you mean to say that you don't sometimes feel one way or another just simply by looking at someone? I don't mean simply whether or not they turn you on, but a sense of value in some way? I understand that we can justify these feelings away, but I'm more interested in the unanalyzed thoughts that seem to come unbidden, know what I mean?
DFIB Posted October 16, 2012 Posted October 16, 2012 I think you are on to something. I have to fight the urge to hire good looking people that are equally qualified as less attractive ones. I am aware of this tendency. When you consider ethnic beauty that is an entirely different conversation. Ethnicity displaces the beauty thresholds. A person that is considered beautiful among their culture might be considered not so in a different culture and vice versa.
Mateo_1387 Posted October 17, 2012 Posted October 17, 2012 Great points Matty. Maybe it is that simple, that she caught my eye and the feelings that anyone would have about kids living in this way were focused on her then? Maybe, through impotence for being able to direct greater change our minds focus on a single change instead, and that focus is directed at whatever is most familiar? I didn't think of that before...her thin nose is out of place here, maybe it's simply the shape of her nose that made me feel that she didn't belong, and nothing deeper at all? The first question you ask is more along the lines of what I was trying to say. I never really thought about the one quality being out of place, leading to the thought of she doesn't belong. There are probably some sociological thoughts on that, though not to my knowledge. I get the impression you saw more than "she doesn't fit", my impression of your thoughts is she was meant to be something greater than what her current environment offers her. I kind of came to this conclusion about what you wrote. The thoughts and ideas you write of come from various experiences, biological processes, cultural behaviors, situations, and the like... Though, it seems this young girl caught your eye to make her stand out from the rest of the children, thus making her really seem like she doesn't belong in that environment. Though, at the same time, the other children probably do not belong either... its just the other children are not in focus of what you were looking at. Something else brother, it seems there is not a simple answer to the question. Maybe knee jerk thoughts/judgements of a person by themselves are superficial and shallow, but the origin of said thoughts/judgements would seem to arise from deep and complex processes... Not sure if this goes along with this discussion, but I recently posted on a friends facebook status about how offensive art still needs to be appreciated. Anyways, I wrote this in response to their post ".... Funny thing is, compared with the opposite, I think potentiation occurs causing the good and the bad to continue distancing from the other on a positive/negative spectrum. Say for example two mini vans are in a major vehicle collision, one van all obviously are safe, healthy, and the other van full of death and injury. Both separately look good or bad, but together, the lucky family looks really lucky, and the unlucky family looks like they have it even worse… Think it could be similar to that thought?
DwayneEMTP Posted October 17, 2012 Author Posted October 17, 2012 That's interesting...definition by association and comparisson? The van story is a great example man.... "Though, it seems this young girl caught your eye to make her stand out from the rest of the children, thus making her really seem like she doesn't belong in that environment. Though, at the same time, the other children probably do not belong either... its just the other children are not in focus of what you were looking at. " Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. There is a huge tendency in my to just ignore the fact that I wish that children didn't have to live like this. I just sort of wash those thoughts with an 'it is what it is' brush, but yeah, maybe that works fine when all of the kids fit into the box in my brain that I've built for them, but not so well when a single child doesn't fit? Pretty cool....
Recommended Posts