Lets get this party started! Post something here so we know you're alive!

[Just Plain Ruff]

Yep chat down, Call ems, seems to be Chat arrest. Push epi

[Richard B the EMT]

Back in the 1960s, and into the early 1970s, NASA delivered the late President Kennedy's objective of getting and returning a man to the Moon. What they held secret for all these years is, the astronauts found insect life on the moon, some of which were brought back.

Unfortunately, some of the bugs escaped! They seem to come out of hiding during a full moon.

What? You've never heard of Lunar Tics?

By the way, Happy Saint Patrick's Day to all Irish, and all who are Irish for the day!

[Violyn]

Back in the 1960s, and into the early 1970s, NASA delivered the late President Kennedy's objective of getting and returning a man to the Moon. What they held secret for all these years is, the astronauts found insect life on the moon, some of which were brought back.

Unfortunately, some of the bugs escaped! They seem to come out of hiding during a full moon.

What? You've never heard of Lunar Tics?

By the way, Happy Saint Patrick's Day to all Irish, and all who are Irish for the day!

Oh brother. Hehe

[JTpaintball70]

Three flights in less than 24 hours. Spent less time in my base city than I have in the air and in other cities.

[island emt]

Nine Important Facts to Remember as You Grow Older:

· Number 9 - Death is the number 1 killer in the world.

· Number 8 - Life is sexually transmitted.

· Number 7 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

· Number 6 - Men have two emotions: hungry and horny, and they can't tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.

· Number 5 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.

· Number 4 - Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.

· Number 3 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

· Number 2 - In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.

· Number 1 - Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today might burn your ass tomorrow.

...and as someone recently said to me:

Don't worry about old age; it doesn't last that long.

[Richard B the EMT]

Don't worry!

Either you're going to be healthy, or sick.

If you're healthy, no problem.

If you're sick, you'll either get better or die.

If you get better, no problem.

If you die, You're either going to go to Heaven or Hell.

If you go to Heaven, no problem.

If you go to Hell, you'll be so busy shaking hands with old friends, you won't have time to worry!

[ERDoc]

Why can't there be any normal, straight forward patients tonight?

[island emt]

you are really stretching the imagination if you think anyone "NORMAL" exists or would be walking into your ER .

it is the moon tide you know

[ERDoc]

Yeah I know, but we can all dream. Can't we?

[island emt]

A RETIREE'S LAST TRIP TO COSTCO

Yesterday I was at Costco buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Watson, the Wonder Dog and was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had, an elephant?

So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog,

I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete, (certified), so it works well and I was going to try it again.

(I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I had stopped to pee on a fire hydrant and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

Costco won't let me shop there anymore. Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say.