Old Friends/Book Ends

[Richard B the EMT]

With apologies to Simon and Garfunkle, just asking:

With my girlfriend, "Lady J's" OK, I have contacted a former girlfriend, who after moving out of the community, I lost touch with from roughly 1980. Lady J has had lunch with my ex fiancée, and spoken with the woman I would have married, had she not given me the "Let's just be friends" answer. Had I not had my platonic (yes, I wanted more!) relationships before I met Lady J (second time, long story only on request), she feels I wouldn't have become the individual she loves.

Due to me being 59 years old, quite happy with the 24 year relationship with Lady J, and merely hoping on reestablishing contact with friends from long ago, that due to time and distance, I have lost contact with, Lady J is on board with me for contacting the "old gang".

A buddy of mine feels both Lady J and I should have our heads examined, that Lady J should be afraid or threatened for our relationship due to this.

What say youze guyz from EMT City?

FYI, the lady I contacted ( 2 years my junior, widowed during the divorce proceedings, living in Florida, 24 year old son) introduced me to the lady who declined the marriage proposal (either a year younger or older than me, in her at least 3rd marriage, mother/stepmother/guardian of 11, lost count, or so she jokes, on grandkids. She is the Navajo I have mentioned on other strings, and lives in Maine). My ex fiancée is 8 months older than I am, still single, living in Bergen County NJ, whom I met in High School in Manhattan, NY. Lady J is 5 months older than I am, and now living 2 blocks away from me. Only the ex fiancée is not originally from my community (the Rockaways, Queens County) in NYC.

I add that I have had friends who were girls, but so far back that it was totally platonic. I wasn't yet interested in girls as "girlfriends".

[Just Plain Ruff]

Richard, I have found that the older i get the less I want to see my old highschool friends. The less I want to even connect with previous work friends.

I also find that unless the current Mrs. R is ok with me contacting previous Girlfriends, then that issue is closed and I just don't. I have and it was a mess.

But I suspect that you have a pretty solid relationship so just be careful, you never know what kind of feelings meeting this person after all these years will dredge up.

I also look at it this way - there is and was a reason why you are not with this person nor why you got married. Sometimes it's best to leave it be.

But it will always be your choice.

[paramedicmike]

I also look at it this way - there is and was a reason why you are not with this person nor why you got married. Sometimes it's best to leave it be.

Exactly. They're called ex- for a reason.

[island emt]

I'm curious why an old fat retired guy would want to relive his teen years???

[ERDoc]

I'm curious why an old fat retired guy would want to relive his teen years???

Raises hand and quickly puts it back down

As for ex-girlfriends, I think it is a personal choice that needs to be agreed upon by both people in the relationship. As for me, I say hells to the no!!! Most of my exes are batshit crazy and the farther away the better.

[Kiwiology]

I have no contact with my ex and haven't had any since about a week or two after we split, it was as I had never existed.

As for the "friendly females" I have known, I still speak to one every now and again on her birthday or Christmas but that's it, nothing more, one I have nothing to do with and the other I see on Facebook every now and again.

Then there is the matter of Emergentologists wife ....

[Richard B the EMT]

I'm curious why an old fat retired guy would want to relive his teen years???

During those years, I had few friends. I've lost contact with several of them, don't want to lose contact with any more of them. As for the ladies, I realize the fires are out, the embers no longer glow, but some warmth remains.

I lost contact due to time and distance, nothing else. We all get caught up in the here and now, neglect the past. I'm just trying to keep up a small, pleasant part of my past, considering all the negativity I went through.

Then there is the matter of Emergentologists wife ....

Not knowing Emergentologist, the wife, or you personally, are you sure you want to continue on that road?

[ERDoc]

As for the ladies, I realize the fires are out, the embers no longer glow, but some warmth remains.

There is a great online pharmacy in Mexico that could send you some Viagra or Cialis for that.

Not knowing Emergentologist, the wife, or you personally, are you sure you want to continue on that road?

I take no offense. Kiwi only wishes he could get a woman as hot as my wife. Maybe if he didn't talk so funny, he might have a chance.

[Just Plain Ruff]

Not knowing Emergentologist, the wife, or you personally, are you sure you want to continue on that road?

I believe that ERDoc burned Kiwi the other day in a different thread.

[DwayneEMTP]

Man, Babs and I had talked about a couple of girls that were really important to me in my highschool years and Babs found them on FB and sent me their information...And I did the same for her.

One, the first love of my life, I was able to visit with a bit before she died, and the other I adore to pieces and we talk all the time. Babs also found an early boyfriend, the 'one that got away', and they still talk too.

My feeling is this; If he was important enough that she loved him then, and remembers and remenisces about him now, why would I want to deny that for her? Anyone that can make my girl laugh and remind her how special she is...I'm onboard. Life only, in my experience, visits a finite number of these folk on us...I'm not sure why anyone would want to move on..

Are we all going to move in together and be a big, happy family? I sure hope not. But I trust her to have her boundries, as she does me...So I see no issues.