left out in the cold

[streetsweeper]

Hey, I'm new here and just wanted to blow off some steam. Well I am a 38 y/o paramedic with 18 yrs experience as an als provider. I am physical and mentally burnt out. I am presently off with the following; T-5 disk protrusion, T6,T7,T8 bulged,,,Hypertrophic degen. with multiple thoracic bone spurs with a lumbar disk gone. I am on LTD an am told that if I am able to work 1 hour a day I am considered to be employable so I get my benefits cut. My employer has no light duties and I am considered a risk now so they would be happy to get rid of me. I started working for $3 an hour in 1989 and have slowly worked my way up to $20 per hour,,,, now I'm done.

I feel like I worked my ass of and literally broke my back to get a slap in the face.

I have a sour taste in my mouth for this job that I once loved. I would instead of waiting for another crew to come to help lift, muscle the patient down the stairs or through the snow banks with my partner. I went through a few partners. I was crazy,, where did it get me. All the people I helped ,especially my employer and for what.

Nobody gives a rats ass about you when your done.

And mentally I am burnt... My body does not produce adrenaline, I drive my truck and something jumps in front of me and I don't even flinch. I am de-sensitized nothing seems to be significant to me. When you are pumped all the time and everything is so life or death and its all up to you then everything thing else is shit. Even family issues don't seem to matter. I don't cry or laugh. I feel like a stone.

Yea this job really messes you up and when you become aware of it your already done for.

Well that felt good , sorry if I rained on someones parade but its the cold hard facts. When peeps say you give your heart and soul to your job they don't know how true it is.

Well thanks for the interest........

[Dustdevil]

To all those who wonder why I spend so much time trying to dissuade the weak from making a career of EMS, read the above post again. The fewer people this happens to, the better.

[Ridryder 911]

As I have always said " You may love EMS ; but EMS will NEVER love you !

I hope you can get into another career, and better yourself off. Sorry this occurred, from one old veteran to another.....

R/R 911

[streetsweeper]

I feel like I found a new home here. Thanks for the support.

I too hope I can educate people from making a mistake in this career. This is not a life time job. It is a 10 year career at most. So what are you going to do when your done, at age 30 or 40 with a messed up back? Who wants you then? 18 years for me I am Lucky I got this far. so now what? You are just as we say, a warm body to carry a stretcher. There are many more new 20 y/o waiting in line when your used up.

[medik8]

Hey, I'm new here and just wanted to blow off some steam. Well I am a 38 y/o paramedic with 18 yrs experience as an als provider. I am physical and mentally burnt out. I am presently off with the following; T-5 disk protrusion, T6,T7,T8 bulged,,,Hypertrophic degen. with multiple thoracic bone spurs with a lumbar disk gone. I am on LTD an am told that if I am able to work 1 hour a day I am considered to be employable so I get my benefits cut. My employer has no light duties and I am considered a risk now so they would be happy to get rid of me. I started working for $3 an hour in 1989 and have slowly worked my way up to $20 per hour,,,, now I'm done.

I feel like I worked my ass of and literally broke my back to get a slap in the face.

I have a sour taste in my mouth for this job that I once loved. I would instead of waiting for another crew to come to help lift, muscle the patient down the stairs or through the snow banks with my partner. I went through a few partners. I was crazy,, where did it get me. All the people I helped ,especially my employer and for what.

Nobody gives a rats ass about you when your done.

And mentally I am burnt... My body does not produce adrenaline, I drive my truck and something jumps in front of me and I don't even flinch. I am de-sensitized nothing seems to be significant to me. When you are pumped all the time and everything is so life or death and its all up to you then everything thing else is Ca Ca. Even family issues don't seem to matter. I don't cry or laugh. I feel like a stone.

Yea this job really messes you up and when you become aware of it your already done for.

Well that felt good , sorry if I rained on someones parade but its the cold hard facts. When peeps say you give your heart and soul to your job they don't know how true it is.

Well thanks for the interest........

Unfortunately, you speak the truth. Problem is....when it sucks you in...it's almost impossible to escape. It's like an addiction...as you know. I'm so sorry....thank you, from me, for all the years and for all you've done. I appreciate it...after all, you're like family, and it's best we all stick together. :wink:

Best of luck to you...

xoxo 8

[emtkelley]

You didn't rain on anyone's parade. In fact, perhaps your words might prevent this happening to someone else here.

I have a back injury myself and have been very careful about how I lift, ect. I blew out my t-5 in a car accident pre-EMS and have been very fortunate that I have healed fairly well. I have had to face facts that my days as a provider might be limited, and it's tough to do.

I thank you also for what you have given of yourself to a job that has obviously been a great passion of yours. Have you considered the possibility of sharing your experience and knowledge in the form of instruction? You have alot to bring to the table. So many medics could benefit from the skills you posess.

Take care of yourself,

Kelley

[retired_medic61]

I agree. That is why I try to keep people from making this a full time career.

[Ridryder 911]

I can understand your opinion, but you have to admit it is a lot better than it used to be. One can actually make a living in it. Actually, some of the medics I know do quite well for 10 days a month. Majority of the ones I work with make = or if not better than my RN counter parts per yearly basis. Middle income for approximate 120 shifts is not really bad, it could be worse. Especially, considering the required education level.

Amazing, I see plenty leave and many return after they find out, that is not any easier in another profession. It is definitely better than some... and yes, I am sure not as good as many, like any other job. But as long as we have only part-timers or volunteers, it will never get better.

The same is true in nursing.. my professor calls them appliance nurses.. ones that only work when they have to make a big purchase. It discourages administration from ever taking F.T.E. seriously, when you have easy replacements.

Yes, I agree, we have a LONG way to go.... but, until we raise the bar of education level, and those only serious enough to make it a true profession, it will never grow.

Sorry, you are burned out.. yes, I do understand after 29 years full time in EMS I can emphasize. Yes, it is not definitely not an easy profession and yes, we have a LONG way to go before it is a great profession. But, if most only took it serious (not wackers) and tried to really change things at legislative and professional level, we could improve it faster.

Be safe,

R/R 911

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