Stupid things you've said on calls

[R8DR_EMT]

Brilliant me: "Was that the right or left spleen?"

Nice..... :occasion5:

[R8DR_EMT]

We're on scene of a slip/trip/fall type call and our team of 2 EMT-B's and 2 Medics start assessing the patient. Usually the Medics let us do all the fun stuff, like assessment, some treatment and packaging. Well this day, our Lead Medic tells us he's going to place the young lady on the LSB. So, the other Medic (pretty senior guy) goes out to get the LSB....he comes back in and says out loud "Hey, there are only two backboard straps in the kit"... our Lead Medic says "Um...isn't that all we need"....

I know...not too funny, but you would have to know the Medic's in question....LOL

[Eric]

went on sceen to get a body took one look at the dead person and said thats a lot of dead wight PT was over 400 pounds

[Asysin2leads]

Not on a call, but while working in the ER as a medic student.

Man sitting in very much pain with a nail driven sideways through three of his fingers.

Me: "Oh, so were you using a nailgun?"

No, he sat there with a friggin hammer and nailed it through each of his individual fingers, genius.

[EMSGUY07@aol.com]

my first ems shift i was 16 and workin as a emt-b and i was in the back with an elederly man and he said son you look pretty young how long have you been doing this and i said ohh, about 3 hours and i smiled he never said another word after that LOL

[PRPGfirerescuetech]

Not on a call, but while working in the ER as a medic student.

Man sitting in very much pain with a nail driven sideways through three of his fingers.

Me: "Oh, so were you using a nailgun?"

No, he sat there with a friggin hammer and nailed it through each of his individual fingers, genius.

Similar situation. Guy nailgunning nails to the floor, between his legs, nails his testicles to the floor. Cant get up without exponential increase in pain. EMS cuts out floor. Brings to ER.

Hes holding himself, crying and whimpering, and I said "so what hurts"

You can guess the answer...

[PMedic850]

I arrive in a fly-car for a patient having chest pain. Mid 40's patient, very heavy accent. Doing my assessment & 12 lead, I hear the ambulance bringing the stretcher in. It's about 2am. I'm busy doing an IV, thinking about her 12 lead & meds, etc.

She asks a question (I thought she said, "are they bringing in the stretcher") & I replied "Yes"...She starts to yell & the FD starts to laugh.

I ask, why is everyone laughing & the patients yelling "Why would you say something like that!"(... in her heavy accent...).

The Fire Dept said, "She asked if she was going to die, and you said 'Yes' ".

That was my shining moment, by the time we got to the hospital, she was laughing

[EMT001]

I treated a lady who tried to kill herself by swallowing all the pills she had in her house. She ended up surviving. A few months later I was called to a MVA in the middle of the night. By the time we got there, the first-in crew had already back boarded the patients and were nice enough to put them into the rigs while I checked the damage on the car. I got into the rig to talk to the patient and the woman staring up at me goes, "Do you remember me?" Of course, I don't. I apologize and ask where she knew me from. It turned out that she was the woman I had treated for the OD a few months back. She goes on to tell me that "She had wanted to kill herself at the time." Apparently, my brain stopped working because my response was "Oh, how'd that work out for you?" :oops:

[cdemt5710]

:oops: Got to the scene of an assisted living home where a visitor had fallen and struck his head on a concrete floor and had swelling and a sizeable laceration. I was assessing him and asked if he was experiencing blurring of vision. One of my crewmates nudged me and said "hhhmm.. he's blind, remember?" Yeah, we had treated him in the past. Even worse was the fact that I knew him personally. He was not offended and ribbed me about it. Still felt like the numbest moron around for a bit....

[purpledriver38]

During a difficulty breathing call, we arrive to find the patient sitting on the toilet, unresponsive, with a pulse but shallow respiration's that were decreasing as the call progressed. Due to the small size of the bathroom, the best extrication method was going to be a backboard. My medic, 3 yrs into his medic career, stated "you take the back legs & I'll grab the front legs"!!! Of course, he meant the arms but we haven't let him live it down. Today he is a supervisor & we remind him often of his 'statement'!!!