Stupid things you've said on calls

[akroeze]

Not me that was involved...heard it through the grapevine yesterday. Seems to have a better effect if read out loud.

Crew while on an emerg call had this conversation with (I'm assuming) an RPN:

RPN: (while giving history) "Now why would they write that the patient has roadside assistance on her chart?"

Crew: "huh?, what do you mean?"

RPM: "Yeah, it says right here that she has triple A."

LOL....The medic telling this story swears that it happened.

Just out of curiosity, why are you assuming it's an RPN?

[medik8]

Transported a guy a few years back...both legs amputated. En route, of course, as we turned corners, etc...he was moving all over the place and I kept having to "right" him. At one point...he fell against my legs and looked at me, as I pushed him back up yet again...I stated with a smile..., "It's ok...you can lean on me if you need to." (Not like he was enjoying it, or had a choice in the matter. :roll: ) No sooner than that was out of my smily mouth....I was horrified. :shock: The guy obviously didn't find it too funny either, and proceeded to call me a smartass. (I honestly wasn't trying to be mean...it just slipped out).

Way to go, Einstein.... :oops:

xoxoxo

8

[medic_9]

Just out of curiosity, why are you assuming it's an RPN?

I am assuming it's an RPN because of the nursing home that it happened at. They have maybe 1-2 RN's per shift and the RN is normally not around when we are there and it's the RPN who is standing there trying to give us some history (usually preceded or followed by "but i don't know they aren't my patient".)

[firewench]

Call dropped for a GSW. We arrive on scene, the cops are 20 feet away, among a circle of patrol cars. Gigantic victim all by himself out there in the middle of Colfax (Denver), face down. Should be dead, free tube for me...I put my hand on the back of his head figuring to hold c-spine, turn him & palp the wound in that magical way we multitask. As I squish my fingertips in the holes I wonder to myself why it's not mushy & simultaneously this dude sits straight up & says, "My head hurts." I say, "I bet it does." No, that's not the funny part...I've heard how & why he got shot (crack, light fingered ladies of the evening & a .22). We're at the ER later for another yummy East Denver call & I check on the big fella. He's covered up to his neck in a sheet, I go in w/my partner. Dude sees us, looks at me, says "It's my angel, you saved my life," I reply, "aw, there was nothing to save." Ooops. #-o

[hammerpcp]

I am assuming it's an RPN because of the nursing home that it happened at. They have maybe 1-2 RN's per shift and the RN is normally not around when we are there and it's the RPN who is standing there trying to give us some history (usually preceded or followed by "but i don't know they aren't my patient".)

I sure as hell hope it wasn't an RN who said that.

This was a stupid action, rather then a stupid saying. I learned a good lesson though. The pt was lying on the sidewalk and I was driving. I pulled the truck up and parked next to the pt. My partner and I got out, grabbed the equipment and started assessment etc. BTW we always leave the truck running on emergency calls, and the tail pipe is out the side rather then the rear of the vehicle. Needless to say we almost got gassed out by the diesel fumes blowing right at us. I won't ever do that again. I now consider at least four things when I deciding where to park at a scene, safety, access, egress, and fumes.

[Michael]

Park smart?

[Punisher]

Part of my current job is occasionally picking up bodies for the coroner's office.....because people around here seem to think it's the way to go, we deal a lot with pedestrian vs. freight train cases (even more than I ever realized in several years of full time EMS). Two of these cases have been interesting.....one being hearing a cop holler "SOMEONE STOP THAT CAT!" Everyone turns, looks at him..... "He's got one of the eyes!"

The other one was the most recent one I worked and the guy did it out in the countryside....higher speeds....i.e. more pieces to pick up. Well we had this young volunteer firefighter who was out there to "assist" (later found out, that he jumped the call without being dispatched) and had brought his girlfriend along (clad in a VFD shirt so no one would "suspect" anything :roll: ) Basically Randy Rescue wanted to show off.....well he was pale and sweating profusely as we walked the tracks gathering up parts of the victim. I got tired of his "help" and decide to make him look like an ass in front of his girlfriend, so I look at Mike (the guy I was working with) and smile. We keep walking.....and I come across a spleen. So I turn and very loudly proclaim: "Looks like I win! Here's his spleen! You're buying dinner!" Needless to say I bet his girlfriend took a different opinion of his macho BS about being a tough firefighter after seeing him faint and puke because of someone holding up a spleen. :wink:

[Eveninghorse]

While riding as a student I was trying to make a good impression with the medic. We get this "medical" call "fire on scene." As we arrive I start the patient assesment. PT's wife tells me that he seems to be lathargic and is slurring his speech. I overthink the situation, figure I don't need to start with a SAMPLE history and cut right to the chase(idiot)... Cincinatti stroke scale... slurred speech, I check his pupils and one seems to less reactive, I check for one sided weakness but he has trouble supporting both arms. Onset was less than an hour ago so I tell the medic that we should contact the hospital 'cause we have a great candidate for thrombolitic therapy.

Medic checks blood glucose... 65 ... history of diabetes... "why don't we just give him some sugar." :oops:

So... every call... B.S.I., scene safety,etc. right down the list.

[hammerpcp]

While riding as a student I was trying to make a good impression with the medic. We get this "medical" call "fire on scene." As we arrive I start the patient assesment. PT's wife tells me that he seems to be lathargic and is slurring his speech. I overthink the situation, figure I don't need to start with a SAMPLE history and cut right to the chase(idiot)... Cincinatti stroke scale... slurred speech, I check his pupils and one seems to less reactive, I check for one sided weakness but he has trouble supporting both arms. Onset was less than an hour ago so I tell the medic that we should contact the hospital 'cause we have a great candidate for thrombolitic therapy.

Medic checks blood glucose... 65 ... history of diabetes... "why don't we just give him some sugar." :oops:

So... every call... B.S.I., scene safety,etc. right down the list.

LMAO.....I hope they never let you hear the end of that one. :wink:

[resqmdc14]

A few weeks ago we had a rather heavy patient in tight quarters. I asked for an additional alert for lifting power. A neighboring department was traveling through and heard my call for help. When they offered, I simply replied, "An extra pair of hands might not help."

DUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!