Stupid things you've said on calls

[TechMedic05]

Over the radio - Initially called for a respiratory arrest, or something to that affect.

"XY Ambulance 2, update from 911 - your patient is now breathing."

-"Received. Sounds good."

"Second update from 911, your patient is again not breathing."

-"Received. Sounds bad."

[SGT.M]

Ill never forget this one as long as I live , I was working in a small vol fire dept in east Texas we rolled up on an mva with a brand spanking new EMT-B, the women in the wreck looked in pretty bad shape but was actually pretty stable( lot of facial lacerations) the newbie said to her "do you have a feeling of impending doom" OH S*$T. anyway she said back to him " I do now" we never saw him again.

[MedicBob]

Partner said it. He asked for a repeat on an address. Yadda yadda yadda door F. My partner, name starts with an F, asks "F as in me?" I had to stop the truck and couldn't tell him why for a few moments. He didn't find it very funny when other crews called to congratulate him. He is also the shift supervisor.

[Imagine89]

So it was my first CMED report to the hospital, and it was late, I was tired, and after establishing connection with CMED, I of course, being the suave person I am, say "we're on route to your facilit-" at this point I realize I haven't been patched through to the hospital yet...I still hear hell about that.

[dropdeded]

Recently transfered a ped, asked Mom if the "guy" at the kids bedside was Dad. Mom says,"Thats a girl" :oops:

Looked like a guy to me :roll:

ed

[Coach Hohman]

Not really completley stupid..but it was a funny sequence none-the-less

Elderly pt. possible broken right hip, down in kitchen floor

Myself: Hi, I'm EMT Hohman from the EMS, How are you today?

Woman: How am I? Well let's see..I'm laying in my kitchen floor and my hip hurts like hell, how are you?

Myself: Well...I'm doing alright, thanks

Woman: Well isn't that wonderful (sarcasm) How about we cut the formality bulls_it and get me off this floor

Myself: Yes, Mrs. **

As I'm taking a history I get this

Woman: Look, son..how old are you?

Myself: I'm 19 m'am

Woman: See this pair of shoes...older than you...how bout we stop asking questions and get me on the road.

I decided to do the rest of my assessment en route...she scared the shiit out of me

[hammerpcp]

Not really completley stupid..but it was a funny sequence none-the-less

Elderly pt. possible broken right hip, down in kitchen floor

Myself: Hi, I'm EMT Hohman from the EMS, How are you today?

Woman: How am I? Well let's see..I'm laying in my kitchen floor and my hip hurts like hell, how are you?

Myself: Well...I'm doing alright, thanks

Woman: Well isn't that wonderful (sarcasm) How about we cut the formality bulls_it and get me off this floor

Myself: Yes, Mrs. **

As I'm taking a history I get this

Woman: Look, son..how old are you?

Myself: I'm 19 m'am

Woman: See this pair of shoes...older than you...how bout we stop asking questions and get me on the road.

I decided to do the rest of my assessment en route...she scared the shiit out of me

LMAO! I love a woman who knows what she wants.

[umd357]

Gee sounds like a rookie mistake. Listen being nice to a patient(s) is all well and good but your there to do a job not socialize. Half the time patients don't give two sh#ts about you .they just want immediate care and no b-s. keep safe out there and watch you backs.

[Coach Hohman]

Gee sounds like a rookie mistake. Listen being nice to a patient(s) is all well and good but your there to do a job not socialize. Half the time patients don't give two sh#ts about you .they just want immediate care and no b-s. keep safe out there and watch you backs.

Though it was a rookie mistake, it was just a slip of the tongue I guess. It's a human reaction to ask someone how they are. In all honesty, I almost have to socialize with patients to gaintheir trust because of my age. I'm the upmost professional, but how man 82 year old women are going to trust a 19 year old. They probably expected me to come in with baggy pants and an Ipod in my ears. I try to be polite normally, but How are you to a woman sprawled out on the floor goes down in the "experience column"

[SingleLovingLife]

Several months ago our VFD was dispatched to a "dog house fire" - don't ask - we're talking Alabama with a capital A here. I was in the vicinity and went in route to locate. From the frontyard I could see the glow from the fire out back. My chief called and wanted to know how close it was to the home. The neighbors were telling me which side of the home we could access it from and I went around to the backyard based on their directions. Unfortunately, none of us realized the homeowner had a second dog tied up out there. Just as I keyed up my mic the second dog lunged at me snarling, growling and barking like something possessed. :shock:

I said a few choice words about the dog - then remembered my radio was keyed up. I promptly recovered my composure and stated, "OK, the dog is NOT happy!" When I called dispatch later in the evening the first thing she said was "Oh my God, that dog didn't bite you, did it?"

By the way, the dog house was a pen about six feet tall, ten feet long, about three feet off the ground and less than twelve feet from the residence. They had been keeping that dog warm with a portable heater and it had tipped over and ignited the dog house. Hmmm...like I said...capital A.

And my department wonders why, being an EMT with limited fire training, I don't enjoy going to fires? :roll: