9 things I hate

[emtek]

9 Things I Hate

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2 People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

<3 When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4 When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!

5When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

6 People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7.When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

8When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

9 When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

[hfdff422]

I can only rebut #2- have you tried to change the sattelite channel with out a remote? Going from channel 6 to 354 takes so long you could go to the store and buy a new remote before you get to the channel manually.

[akroeze]

Source?

Sounds like George Carlin to me...

[emtek]

I don't know the source, I got it in a email.

[Michael]

Ah, rebuttals, or at least explanations.

1. I learned to point at my wrist when asking a stranger what time it is on a noisy, busy city street so that s/he wouldn't mistake my question for "Do you have a dime?"

3. The original thought was "Eat your cake and [then] have it." Outside emesis, wishful thinking.

4. The original thought was "...last place you would look."

5. True love. Your neighbor wants to make sure you benefited from the view and is ready to explain what you missed.

6. At the supermarket, Sam runs into the lawyer who lives next door. "Say, George, how are you?" "Fine." "George, how much do you lawyers charge?" "Three questions for $200." "Wow. That's pretty steep, isn't it?" "Yup. That'll be $200."

7. You're right.

8. "What the Hell" is exactly what some people may have in mind.

9. You're right again (So what else is new?)