Why Farting is bad for you--A MUST READ ..CAUTION: LAUGHTER

[windsong]

This is a story about a couple who had been happily

> married for years.

> The only friction in their marriage was the husband's

> habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke.

> The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make

> her eyes water and make her gasp for air.

> Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping

> them off because it was making her sick. He told her

> he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural.

> She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that

> one day he would blow his guts out.

> The years went by and he continued to blast them out!

> Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the

> turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep,

> she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey

> innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare

> parts and a malicious thought came to her.

> She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband

> was sound asleep and, gently pulling back the bed

> covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants

> and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.

> Some time later she heard her husband waken with his

> usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood

> curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as

> he ran into the bathroom. The wife could hardly

> control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing,

> tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned

> she had got him back pretty good.

> About twenty minutes later, her husband came

> downstairs in his bloodstained underpants with a look

> of horror on his face.

> She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter.

> He said, "Honey, you were right." "All these years you

> have warned me and I didn't listen to you."

> "What do you mean?" asked his wife.

> "Well, you always told me that one day I would end up

> farting my guts out, and today it finally happened.

> But by the grace of God, some Vaseline, and two

> fingers, I think I got most of them back in