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Ten Thoughts to Ponder


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Ten Thoughts to Ponder

Number 10

Life is sexually transmitted.

Number 9

Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die

Number 8

Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Number 7

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

Number 6

Some people are like a Slinky.....not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

Number 5

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Number 4

All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism

Number 3

Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

Number 2

In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006:

We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.

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