& they have the hide to have a go at us for our PCR's...

[aussiephil]

ACTUAL WRITING ON HOSPITAL CHARTS

1. The patient refused autopsy.

2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.

3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.

4. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only

a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.

5. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she

was very hot in bed last night.

6. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

7. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it

disappeared.

8. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears

to be depressed.

9. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.

10. Discharge status: Alive, but without my permission.

11. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert, but forgetful.

12. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

13. She is numb from her toes down.

14. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.

15. The skin was moist and dry.

16. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.

17. Patient was alert and unresponsive.

18. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.

19. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until she

got a divorce.

20. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.

21. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.

22. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.

23. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

24. Skin: somewhat pale. but present.

25. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.

26. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.

27. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.

28. When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.

29. The patient was in his usual state of good health until his

airplane ran out of gas and crashed.

30. Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.

31. She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate

directions in early December.

32. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Smith, who felt we should sit

on the abdomen and I agree.

33. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stock broker instead.

34. By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was feeling better.

[thecroc]

great just great

if a emt or paramedic did that we would be kick right out but if a dr or nurse did it very one smiles and or laughs at it

:roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :? :? :? :? :? :? :!: :!: :!: :!: :!: :?: :?: :?:

[bbbrammer]

I have seen stuff like this on some charts. It really makes you go back and look at some of your own PCR's and see if you have anything like this written down. I know I have done some stuff like this in the past. (And knowing me I can look forward to it in the future.)

[Just Plain Ruff]

It sucks when someone deciphers your handwriting.

I like to think that as a profession us EMS'rs have better handwriting.

[DwayneEMTP]

"18. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid."

Man, that's how the exam feels sometimes....

Dwayne