50 thing to do in wallmart

[thecroc]

Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them

and stranding them at strategic locations.

2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.

3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten-minute intervals

throughout the day.

4. Don't bother doing your own shopping. Simply find someone with a full trolley containing roughly the items you need, and when they are not looking take it and go pay for it at the checkout. (this is not stealing, they did not own the items yet, they were simply 'moving them around')

5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the

spray air fresheners.

6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift-wrap.

7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.

8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit, then arrange them into erotic poses. (be creative with the gift-wrap tubes used in point 6).

9. When there are people behind you, walk really slowly,

especially in thin aisles.

10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I

think we've got a code 3 in housewares," and see what happens.

11. Turn all the radios to polka stations; then turn them off

and turn the volume up to full blast.

12. Re-enact a fatal incident involving the automatic doors.

13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi. I haven't seen

you in so long." etc. See if they play along. Insist on calling them 'Bob', and if they protest, get angry about it (violent if necissary).

14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself

loud enough for all to hear, "Who buys this crap anyway?!"

15. When you leave the store, try your car keys in the door of every car in the car park until you get to your own. Then drive off as if this is perfectly normal. (Note- if you don't actually own a car and walked to the store, attempt the above by substituting car keys with your house keys).

16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you are

taking it for a test drive.

17. Follow people through the aisles, staying about 5 feet

behind them. Do this until they leave the store.

18. Ask if you can test some super-glue before buying it, then walk around the store gluing random items to other items/customers/staff. For added fun: See how many cashiers you can glue to each-other before any of them notice.

19. As the cashier runs your purchase over the scanner say "BEEP" in a loud voice. Repeat this for every item, and for other customers items. If the cashier protests, kill them.

20. Take off your shoes and tell them you want to return it and

when they say you didn't buy it there say "The customer is always right dammit!!" Make a scene.

21. Move "Caution : Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.

22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you

will only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.

23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can catch from other

aisles.

24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying,

"I'm Batman. Come Robin, to the Batcave."

26. Climb things.

27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.

28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello"

upside down. Once you have mastered this, progress to "boobs".

29. When someone asks you if you need help, begin to cry and

say, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"

30. When 2 or 3 people are walking ahead of you, run between

them yelling "Red Rover."

31. Make up nonsense products and ask employees if there are any

in stock. (i.e.: Shnerples). Do a vague hand-mime of what a 'Shnerple' looks like to assist them.

32. Take up an entire aisle in toys by setting up a full-scale

battle with G.I. Joe vs. X-men.

33. Take bets on the battle from above.

34. Test the brushes and combs in Cosmetics on all the live animals in Pet-Care.

35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask

the clerk where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as

possible.

36. Hold indoor shopping cart races.

37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from

Mission Impossible.

38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.

39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags against their will.

40. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to

your Twinkies."

41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.

42. Two words: Marco Polo.

43. Leave Cheerios in lawn and garden, pillows in the pet

section, etc.

44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's using an alternative alphabet of your choosing.

45. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look with

various funnels.

46. When someone steps away from his or her cart to look at

something, quickly place random combinations of items in their cart, such as 'A Large Cucumber and a Tub of Vasceline'.

47. Relax in the patio furniture drinking beer until you get kicked out.

48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, drop to

your knees and scream, "No, no, its those voices again."

49. Pay off layaways 50 cents at a time.

50. Drag a lounge chair over to the magazines and relax. Go to

the food court, buy a drink, and explain that you don't get out

much and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.

:twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:

[wakkoemt807]

Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them

and stranding them at strategic locations.

27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.

36. Hold indoor shopping cart races.

45. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look with

various funnels.

I've actually done these lol! I've also had a blast in the toy aisle...I've set off all the sirens on the fire trucks/ambulances/police cars, set off ANY and ALL toys that talk, and set off a whole end cap of bouncing Tiggers so they would jump off their shelves a row at a time!

[spenac]

who needs an amusement park when we've got wally world? :twisted:

[wakkoemt807]

45. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look with

various funnels.

This was actually in Target and not Walmart...my nephew doing his Tin Man from the Wizard of Oz impression

[CodeBlueEMT]

Those are the 50 reasons I hate Walmart.

Shayne

[island emt]

Quote :"14.4. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself

loud enough for all to hear, "Who buys this crap anyway?!"

The correct question is WHO in their right mind buys all this chinese CRAP !

Wallmart is a blight on America

[Just Plain Ruff]

one more

climb and hide inside the clothing displays you know the circular racks of clothes. When someone looks at one of the items say "Pick ME!!! Pick ME!!!"

[fire911medic]

I tried to put MM's on layaway, and a little old lady behind me said, "honey if you can't afford a pack of MM's, I'll buy them for you". Lol, it was too funny.

I also have walked around with the wet floor cones on my head all through the store, only to get one of their security guys to get the manager come look at me (that was most fun ! ). The manager laughed hysterically. It was great.

Last thing I've done to get myself in trouble in walmart was set off every single thing toy that could possibly go off. I thought I had drove the employees crazy 'cause I overheard a lady saying they couldn't find any help in the toy area....hehe.

It's fun to be terrible in Walmart !

[Eydawn]

Sounds like a camp staff night off, to be honest. I think there were only 2 or 3 on that entire list that I didn't A: witness B: participate in C: stand lookout for D: talk to management about profusely apologizing for our "immature younger staff members".

You forgot to add the pillowfights in the light bulb aisle, the grabbing of foam swim noodles to utilize as alien antennae or swords of wrath, dropping an airsoft BB jug only to watch the fluorescent plastic orange balls go rolling everywhere and anywhere, losing the CIT to the aforementioned circular clothes rack trick, staff eyeing the eggs with devious looks of glee, female and male staff members alike grabbing mini watermelons, grapefruit, pummelo, etc to try to achieve the "superbimbo" look, everyone trying on the rollerblades and racing down the aisles, and so on and so forth.... oh not to mention the bouncy balls and anything that makes sound being grabbed eagerly only to be abandoned in the snack food aisle...

Gosh, I can't wait for summer again lol!

Wendy

CO EMT-B

MI EMT-B