Well I can't figure it out...

[Britpara]

1. Why does a gynaecologist leave the room when the patient gets undressed?

2. If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all the way down to the core of the earth?

3. Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?

4. Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your ar$e?

5. Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say, 'My name is Mick, and I am an alcoholic'?

6. If you mated a bulldog and a $hitsu, would it be called a bull$hit?

7. Why are they called stairs inside but steps outside?

8. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

9. Why does mineral water that 'has trickled through mountains for centuries' have a 'use by' date?

10. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp no one would eat?

11. Is French kissing in France just called kissing?

12. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink whatever comes out'?

13. What do people in China call their good plates?

14. If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

15. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the toilet is?

16. Why does goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

17. What do you call male ballerinas?

18. Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??

19. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

19. Why is a person that handles your money called a 'Broker'?

20. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

21. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from

vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

22. If a man is talking in the forest, and no woman is there to

hear him,is he still wrong?

23. Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?

24. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

25. Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a haemorrhoid when it's in your ar$e?

26. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you but when you take him in the car, he sticks his head out the window?

27. How does the man who drives the snowplough get to work?

28. If all is not lost, where is it?

29. What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

[inman]

Why do you drive on a parkway, and park on a driveway?

What is the difference between partly sunny and partly cloudy?

[CBEMT]

Why do hotdogs come in packages of 8, but buns come in packages of 10?

[j_tamisiea]

easy answers, idiots (politicians named the roads)

meteorologists are about as stupid as ______ (your choice)

and the hot dog question to make you ask questions

[ERDoc]

Why do you park on a driveway, and drive on a parkway?

Answer:

The usages are extended from the base meanings of the words, and are consistent with these meanings.

A "park" is a place set aside for a specific purpose.

The English word way is the equivalent of the Latin word via, meaning "road" or "path." Thus a "parkway" is a road (way) through a park. The road is used by cars, thus you can drive on a parkway, that is you can drive on the road (way) through the park.

The term driveway originated as the designation for the place you drive you car into at the house, like from the gate of the farm, or estate, to the house. When you got to the end of the driveway, you would park the car. ("Park," as in the meaning described above, because you are putting the car in the place designated for the car, that is the car park.)

The term driveway was thus established and continued to be used, even when people with tract houses had only a short "way" to drive to the house, so the place where you drive the car into by any house is called a driveway.

It is still consistent with the base meaning and broader usage of the term in that you "drive" into and onto the "way" designated for the car for that dwelling.

Taken from here.

[katbemeEMT-B]

1. Why does a gynaecologist leave the room when the patient gets undressed? He doesn't want to spoil the surprise

2. If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all the way down to the core of the earth? Do we really ever own land

3. Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed? Do we ever close our mouths

4. Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your ar$e? I like to wiggle my butt

5. Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say, 'My name is Mick, and I am an alcoholic'? AA is for quitters

6. If you mated a bulldog and a $hitsu, would it be called a bull$hit? Now that's funny

7. Why are they called stairs inside but steps outside? HMMMMM...

8. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer? Cause it's too cold?

9. Why does mineral water that 'has trickled through mountains for centuries' have a 'use by' date? So you buy it more often. Marketing gimic

10. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp no one would eat? To see how friggin dumb people really are

11. Is French kissing in France just called kissing? Ewww, french kissing is gross. LOL

12. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink whatever comes out'? My ex

13. What do people in China call their good plates? Paper

14. If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat? He was too busy fixin Ginger and MaryAnn

15. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the toilet is? That wouldn't be polite

16. Why does goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs! Pluto can't get it up

17. What do you call male ballerinas? Cause they're a bunch of sissys

18. Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream?? Good question

19. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner? It was all for the good of the hunt

19. Why is a person that handles your money called a 'Broker'? Cause they cause you to go broke

20. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? Testicles

21. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from

vegetables, then what is baby oil made from? Not touching that one

22. If a man is talking in the forest, and no woman is there to

hear him,is he still wrong? Nope, they're never right

23. Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure? Cause we're dumb

24. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup? Sure, they practice spelling non-words

25. Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a haemorrhoid when it's in your ar$e? Cause it's a pain in the a$$

26. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you but when you take him in the car, he sticks his head out the window? Animals are almost as strange as people

27. How does the man who drives the snowplough get to work? If it's mine, he doesn't

28. If all is not lost, where is it? In my closet

29. What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

Oh sh*t! Call 911

[Bunnymedic]

18. Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??

good question. I'll ask my blind friend. He'll most likely laugh at me though. funny though, blind people can march in a high school marching band, and be better than everyone else who can actually SEE where they are going. :shock:

[Bombera]

Why is it that when someone tells you that something smells bad and hands it to you, that you smell it? If it smells bad, then why would you want to smell it too?