Funniest EMS stories

[Richard B the EMT]

katgrl2003, you specified your partner's size, but not your own.

I'm not complaining, as I know quite a few female EMTs and Paramedics who don't look, if you will, bulked up, but can bench press well better than I can, and there is always the line about "big surprises in small packages".

Re that last quote...A lady clerk at a convenience store in Suffolk County, New York, weighing in at 90 something pounds and a height of under 5 foot tall, took on an armed robber, over 6 foot high, with what looked like a small battle ax, chasing the man off. Covered by all the news services here in the NYC area, by the way.

[katgrl2003]

katgrl2003, you specified your partner's size, but not your own.

I'm not complaining, as I know quite a few female EMTs and Paramedics who don't look, if you will, bulked up, but can bench press well better than I can, and there is always the line about "big surprises in small packages".

Re that last quote...A lady clerk at a convenience store in Suffolk County, New York, weighing in at 90 something pounds and a height of under 5 foot tall, took on an armed robber, over 6 foot high, with what looked like a small battle ax, chasing the man off. Covered by all the news services here in the NYC area, by the way.

Ok, I have to admit I'm not a tiny person. I'm about 5'7", but I've surprised guys at work by how well I can lift. I work with a girl thats 4'10", can't see over the end of the cot, but can outlift most people. We sent new people to her to learn how to lift.

[fireflymedic]

Had a partner who was a rather tightly wound medic (we nicknamed her paragoddess as a joke, though she really wasn't one, just a little antsy) that I rode in with on a serious trauma (car upside down in ravine) as a basic. My usual partner drove as they loaded the patient in my truck (we were BLS, but closest so responded first). He normally drove really well, but this night, he seemed to have a lead foot and a bit of trouble. The poor medic was getting thrown all over the patient as was I. She yelled at him to slow down and take it easier on the little curvy road we were on about ten times. Finally I heard her tell me to duck. She threw a liter bag of saline through the little window between the cab and the box. It hit the windshield and bounced hitting my partner square in the forehead. We arrived at the hospital and he still had a red mark across his forehead. It was one of the funniest things I'd ever seen.

Several years later (same partner) we were transporting a psych patient (paranoid schizo). The transport was going really smooth until I decided to take his blood pressure. He freaked out (I explained what I was going to do well beforehand) and grabbed my hair which was back in a braid at the time. My partner was keeping an eye on me and saw what was happening. He slammed on the brakes so fast the patient let go of my hair and I flew straight through the walkthrough (different truck) up into the cab. My partner was already out of the truck and was looking around going "what did you do with my partner?" I was laughing so hard I couldn't help it. The guy got restrained and a cop in the buggy, and rest of transport went without incident. We both work for other companies now, but see each other often and still laugh about both things among others.

[Richard B the EMT]

Katgrl2003 said

Ok, I have to admit I'm not a tiny person. I'm about 5'7"

You are taller than I am. I'm 5' 6.5"

[spenac]

Young "virgin" screaming to her mother "it's not mine, I'm a good girl" while the cord is still attached.

[Classair]

I was riding on med __; it was about 22:00 when we were dispatched for a rectal bleed in a nice part of town. We arrived at the front gate punched in the code and looked for the address of the home. We found it, knocked on the door, and was met by a lovely dark haired lady about 35. When we asked if she was the pt she replied, “Oh it’s not me it is my husband.” We walked into the bedroom and found her husband on his hands and knees in the middle of the bed with a nylon bristle brush protruding from his rectum. :oops: :shock: The bristles must have folded just enough for her to insert it, but folded back straight when she pulled back on the handle and perforated his rectum. We looked at each other and like good medics we transported our pt with the impaled object in place. Yes we put him on the stretcher on his hands and knees, belted him across the calves and shoulders and draped a sheet over the poor guy. The handle of the brush held the sheet up and well sort of reminded me of the tents we’d put up as kids. I just had to ask whose idea it was? She just smiled.

[Capman]

So there were these guys who started talking about calls on a forum board. One of the patients found out, got really pissed off and sued the service and the employee for millions. Now the employee works at 7-11 with forty percent of his wages going to the poor "victim." All just for violating the the HIPAA standards.

It was fricking hilarious!!!!

Peace,

Marty

P.S. Of course it is fun to tell stories and I have done it myself. Be very careful when you use phrases that describe a time, place or identifiable event or patient. Especially if it was a recent call. Just a word of warning.

Interesting point! You may want to keep this topic about funny situations around the ambulance base and such. Patient specific humor is a dangerous area, and to post these occurences on the forum is even worse. A clear and obvious HIPPA violation! It is also safe to add that not just EMS workers visit the forum. How would you feel if you read a post where the EMS workers who came to your house were laughing about your situation?

Sure some calls are plaqued with humor, but you can't post them online man!

[MeekoBB]

Not so much funny with the patient, but just my partner and I's reactions... Dispatched to a year old stabbing (thinking wtf?!) -- o/s pt raises his shirt to see the scarring, I asked PD desk to cancel ALS, -- get the guy in the truck where its a little quieter and now I hear wheezing...umm? My partner and I looked at each other with bug eyes and he threw his scope at me for lung sounds while he dove for the oxygen. Wheezing in all fields and he's presently with moderate distress now, which he masked outside...Partner starts vitals and i climb in the truck and ask the desk to get ALS back (who thank god said she hadn't been able to call them yet) so I asked to let them know our route when they call in the city -- ended up passing them, we look at each other pointing to each truck like "we here for you?/you our medics?"...i jump out and give report and definately ended up as a workup (it was a friend on that crew so i knew we was good)

i will definately need to think of some really funny ones i've been on...

[Katee]

once responded to an mvc... car on its side... wintery conditions...

got on scene... got to the patient, only patient.. and he was still strapped into his seat.. eating his pizza he just picked up from local shop

I hate to say this... but "Only in PA"...

It had to happen in PA....

[Echoburger]

"we were called to an asthmatic male patient. on arrival we realized he wasn't asthmatic just drunk. we got him in the back of the truck and i started doing vitals. after i had finished the patient clutched his chest and asked me to check his pulse again. when i did he started stroking my hand and stared at me with this huge grin on his face. my partner was laughing his ass off!! then the patient asked me to check his blood pressure again. when i did he faked passing out....right on me!! i pushed him away and did the sternal rub to "wake" him back up. when we got to the hospital my partner said if a patient rubs your hand it's ok to kiss him on the cheek. i got so much grief for that call!"

lmao. That must have been a good one

I havnt ran any calls so I dont know any funny ones...but...

1. One time I heard on a Pt report that the lady's Chief Complaint was "Im feeling funny" :?:

2. A homeless man "fell" and needed to be "evaluated" at a hospital. He had no injures but insisted on going to a Level 2 Trauma Center. He only said that because he didnt have a ride....oh well...at least he got diverted. :roll: